Debbra B
  • Female
  • Atascadero and Grover Beach, CA
  • United States
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Learning to Practice What I Preach

Since 1999 I have supported others in their grief and loss as a church lay counselor. So many difficulties in life have an element of grief that needs to be completed. In 2005, my 57-year-old step-mom, who raised me, passed away only 2 months after being diagnosed with colon cancer. We felt she didn't even get a chance to battle her illness. I had been taking care of my elderly in-laws since 1995 and spent every holiday with them because it may be their last. With my parents being so young, I never imagined that one of them would die before my in-laws so that my family would never be the same again.

I returned to school and completed a masters in marriage and family therapy. I work now as a pre-licensed professional at the Christian Counseling Center of San Jose. I also have a website www.stages-of-grief-recovery.com to share encouragement and tips with others who are experiencing grief.

During school my dear mother-in-law passed away at 89-years-old. Her healthy 92-year-old husband of 72 years quickly deteriorated in his loneliness for her and passed away just before Thanksgiving, 2009. Packing up their home has been heart-wrenching as they have been my family for 14 years.

Now its time for me to "practice what I have preached" to others; to be kind to myself when I don't feel the energy and motivation I am used to; to cry when I feel like crying; to feel without having to label what I'm feeling even to myself.

Debbra B's Blog

Being kind to myself today

Posted on December 31, 2009 at 11:26pm 0 Comments

Today, I will be kind to myself. I will let myself be lazy and without a to-do list. I will take a break for the constant focus on things-to-do and places-to-go that keep me distracted from my pain. I will play the piano and let my mind wander to memories that make me cry. I will remember that I enjoy playing the piano because my mom made sure I had lessons as a kid. I will let myself cry because I need to when I miss my mom and mother-in-law and father-in-law, wishing I could give them a call… Continue

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