Deborah Martin
  • Female
  • Ortonville, MI
  • United States
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At 12:33pm on July 7, 2011, Marianne said…
I know what you mean!  I will mention Chris in passing and i think sometimes it makes people uncomfortable and I think maybe I shouldn't ever refer to him.  But forget that.....I have 28 years of wonderful memories and anecdotes and sometimes I can't help myself!  Please take good care of yourself; my daughters worry constantly about my being alone and I finally told them I don't have a problem with being alone, I have a problem being alone without their dad!  I want them to live their lives and not worry.  It's a slow process that will take as long as necessary.  My thoughts are with you and I understand your pain.
At 10:39am on July 7, 2011, Marianne said…
Deborah, I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved husband.  I discovered by husband, Chris, dead of a heart attache when our youngest daughter and I came home from the store.  It will be one year on Sunday July 10.  He was only 56 years old and we had been married 28 years.  We celebrated what would have been his 57th birthday on Saturday.  I was not prepared to feel as anxious and sad during this time but I keep remembering the days leading up to his death and try to determine whether there were signs I missed.  Not that that does any good.  I am lucky to have a wonderful support group of family and friends who also loved and appreciated Chris very much.  Believe it or not, better days are ahead.  Accept the support of family and friends as much as you can tolerate and put your own feelings and needs above anyone else's.  I found initially that I had to put on a strong front and make sure everyone else could see that I was holding up okay.  That was exhausting!  I miss him so much and will always love him but I can tell you that those feelings only intensify with time and the horrible pain lessens.  My thoughts are with you.

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