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My deepest sympathy! I was with my son, aged 45, when he died.
That overwhelming feeling of loss! There is nothing like it!
I wish you strength and courage to come around that difficult corner!
You will get to the point of realising that the pain is less acute .....
That you are able to remember more of the good, pleasant memories.
One day you will laugh again, and try, try, to get on with a normal life.
Always here if you just want to talk about him, Dave.