Harold McKinstry
  • Male
  • Saginaw, MI
  • United States
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  • Sara Murphy

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Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Hi All I have been taking a little of everything and have been trying to incorporate it in my life. Deb I have been trying to slow my mind and body down also to adjust to life's new reality. Like it or not it's what I have to work with,…"
Monday
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Tiffany Two months isn't very long sorry for your loss and the pain of it. I have staid in our house, lots of reminders of Diane, not quite as painful as it used to be. It's been over a year I haven't done anything with her clothes,…"
Mar 14
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Marsha YOU GO GIRL. Keep us informed we can live out our dating stuff through you. If nothing else should be entertaining. maybe you can write a book about it along with Chuck. Doesn't hurt to try something new, don't know how it will work…"
Mar 11
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Marsha YOU GO GIRL. Keep us informed we can live out our dating stuff through you. If nothing else should be entertaining. maybe you can write a book about it along with Chuck. Doesn't hurt to try something new, don't know how it will work…"
Mar 11
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Hi Deb I have often thought of meeting someone, not sure if I'm ready for that yet. I kind of feel like you I need to spend some time on just me. Diane had health problems not much for me, so I spent most of my time thinking of her. Not used to…"
Mar 11
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Hi Deb I have often thought of meeting someone, not sure if I'm ready for that yet. I kind of feel like you I need to spend some time on just me. Diane had health problems not much for me, so I spent most of my time thinking of her. Not used to…"
Mar 11
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Marsha So glad your Dr. took the time to read your history and keep you on the medication that has worked so well for you. Were always here for you, I along with everyone on here know how our world has been turned upside down by the loss of our…"
Mar 4
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Marsha Sorry to hear about your problems with Health Care, I can relate to that. Diane had a lot of Pain related problems, not too many Dr. understand the extent of it and your anxiety problems, and they don't have time to get it. She tried…"
Mar 2
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Hi Sara I can imagine it is hard to sell Ken's stuff, memories and connection to our Loved ones. I sold Diane's 3 sewing machines, felt funny she spent a lot of time in that room with her machines. Haven't done much with her other…"
Mar 2
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Tiffany,   Don't feel bad about being angry, I know I went from feeling Love to anger than shame for being angry. Everyone goes through it, as Deb said your emotions will jump all over the place nothing orderly about grief. My wife Diane…"
Feb 18
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"ToddI too took a small break from posting after the Holidays also. Thank You for the Shout Out for making it through the first Anniversary. It's funny the word Anniversary used to have a positive vibe, now it's a negative vibe to do with…"
Feb 17
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Tiffany Sounds like you did the best you could for Valentines Day. It's such a short time for you since the passing of your Husband, I'm sure everything seems unreal and crazy. I understand what you mean it doesn't feel right.…"
Feb 17
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Time for the onslaught of Valentines Day adds with Happy Couples enjoying themselves. Oh Boy Lucky Them "
Feb 6
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Marsha That's exactly the way I feel was I really Married 13 years or have I been single the whole time and dreamed about being Married to Diane. Not that i'm forgetting her I think it's just the way the mind handles it. We…"
Feb 5
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Steve I love that poem says every thing think that we all feel and wish everybody understood'. Thanks for posting it."
Feb 4
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Thanks to all the people that offered support on the 1 year anniversary of Diane's death. It still amazes me how sometimes it seems a short time since I have seen her, and other times seems like forever like a distant memory.  When you are…"
Feb 4

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At 6:34am on January 19, 2017, Kathy Majewski said…

Hello Harold:  Learning how to use this website!  Yes I live in Michigan, at my mailing address is Niles.  I go home Sunday, I've been in Florida visiting my son and his family.  Knowing I could move anywhere I want, I think anywhere out of the cold and snow would be great.  I have a lot to deal with when I get home.  Downsizing is one of them, after taxes and end of year work.  I know it will be hard to walk into my "our" home again but I have to face it.  It seems like the days are going so slowly and that's such a change from how fast I thought it was going.  I fade in and out of my new reality.  Being out of my familiar territory with it's memories has helped but life goes on.  

At 5:12am on January 17, 2017, Kathy Majewski said…

Thank you Harold.  I know that grieving is something that isn't spoken about and not understood until it happens.  My husband and I used to visit in the living room each morning and he'd say, "you know, one of us will be left."  Saying it and reality are two different things.  I feel like my life exploded the day he died.  It's coming back together,slowly.  I think this website will be assuring and helpful.  

At 5:03pm on December 11, 2016, Gigi W said…

Harold, I love your ornament, where did you get it? I miss David so much but always feel better after visiting this page. I feel reassurred I am not losing my mind. Yesterday was 20 months for me and there are still days that my grief overwhelms me. I don't write much but appreciate every sentiment written. I hope you have a good holiday season.

At 7:08pm on September 12, 2016, Melinda CANDACE Guinn said…

Thank you Harold. The only thing that consoles me is I believe in God. I think He saved them all. God brought them Home before worse things could happen to them. As much as I miss them, I think God saved them! I know we'll be reunited!

At 7:58pm on July 27, 2016, Mary Clough said…
Aww Harold iam so very sorry for your loss, My husband was diagnosed with glioblastoma tumor, it is a very aggressive brain cancer with no cure, some people have live at the most for 5 years, but Bobs grew quickly, within 2 weeks he was paralyzed, 4 weeks he was swollen his who,e body wasn't eating, they feed him threw tubes, 6 weeks his kidneys failed and he went on Dialysis, he started having seizures, 10 weeks to the day of his diagnoses I lost him, I was soo hoping we could fight this and keep him alive for the max of 5 years, but it was not to be, now iam alone and missing him more then I could have ever imagine,I can't see this deep pain and sorrow ever going away, he was my everything. Thankyou mary
At 5:18pm on July 27, 2016, Mary Clough said…
Hi Harold, Thankyou for your very kind words, so very sorry for your loss, very over whelming, I was reading some of your comments, my husband was 18 yrs older then me, I had 22 years with him, 23 in sept. He was so very healthy, and this was such a shock. Love mary
At 9:26am on July 22, 2016, carol said…

Harold,  Thank You for your response and welcome to this site.  I am

also a flower garden lover, but alas the deer also love my flowers,  so far this month they have eaten all hostas,  lilys and numerous others. 

I hope you are having a good day today.  Happy Friday.

At 6:59pm on June 24, 2016, Reponsa Bias said…

Thanks so much for the warm welcome. I know it's doing to be a long hard row to hoe, but no one can do it for me. It's been two years yet it feels like yesterday. I awake each day praying it was only a dream I know it's not, just wishful thinking. He was real.

At 6:28pm on March 8, 2016, Sara Murphy said…

I agree.  I find it impossible to believe it will ever get better.   When people ask that dreaded question "how are you doing", I'll tell some of them I'm in a living hell.  I've also told Ken our roles have reversed since his passing, before I had to watch him suffer and now he has to watch me suffer.  I'm going to hold on to hope though that eventually, probably some day long in the future, I'll be able to see the light (either light will do)

At 4:44pm on March 8, 2016, Sara Murphy said…

Harold,  I feel as you do with the deep, never ending grief.  I'm only 2 weeks ahead of you, my husband passed on 1/13/16.  I contacted my doctor last week because I needed something to help.  Mornings for me are the worst.  I'm so full of anxiety but still have to get up to go to work.  With my husband here, I had strength to do anything.  However sick he was, I could handle it, take care of him, go to work etc.  I got my strength from him.  Without him, I panic over everything so afraid of what the future will hold that I'll have to deal with solo.  The anti-anxiety meds do help a bit.  I can be calmer and focus better at work but it doesn't stop me from crying for him every day, several times a day.  I pray we both find piece although I believe we're a long way from that right now.

Hugs

Sara

 
 
 

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