JCarol
  • Female
  • Pittsburgh PA
  • United States
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Me and MY Best Friend

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Loss of an ex

I lost my very best friend on this earth on Dec 2 2009 at 9:30 am to cancer. He wasn't just my best friend he was my ex-husband. We had been married for 22 years and had 3 children and 5 grand children. He was only 56. We were still very best friends after 14 years of divorce. I loved that man and its hurting pretty bad right now. Because I am the ex his family, who I valued and remained very social with turned on me. They made me feel as though I shouldn't have been with him on his death bed, I was by his side till the end. He had a Harlot that would go home to her husband at night and leave my friend alone. She claimed to love him but would never commit to him and they all felt for her. I am so hurting. Even my own children have been spending more time in her presence than with me. I am feeling so hurt. Is this really normal to feel like this for an ex.. Our divorce was so friendly thats why we remained best friends. We were married 22 years and had 3 children. after all our time together we sort of got bored with each other. After we divorced he sent me an e-mail thanking me for having the courage to do what needed to be done. I had found someone else who made life exciting. We did marry 10 days after our divorce. But through it all we remained good friends. We would have him and his family over for outings, special events, holidays just to have them over. He would introduce himself to others in my and my husbands company as our husband-in law. How much more friendly can that be. I just dont understand his family turning on me and consoling the harlot. the harlot has been married twice and seeing my ex but never comitting so at the end of the day he was alone. I am so hurt.

JCarol's Blog

Loss of an EX

Posted on December 5, 2009 at 1:52am 0 Comments

I lost my very best friend on Dec 2, 2009 at 9:30 am of esophigial cancer. He was my ex husband. We were married for 22 years and had 3 children together. After all the years together I asked for a divorce. I sure wasn' for a lack of Love. We sort of grew bored with each other. After I left he had written me an e-mail telling me that he is glad that one of us had to courage to do what had to be done. It has been 14 years since the divorce but through the years we still were best friends. I… Continue

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At 8:33pm on January 4, 2010, Ernestine Teal said…
I don't know the whole story but I can tell you this from experience. Death and money change people. As far as them turning on you, it is easier for them to focus on being mad at you than to focus on his death. I lost my husband of 41 years on Dec. 6, 2009. I am 57 and he was 61. We were together since I was 16. Long time. I keep waiting for him to peek his head around the door and say it is all a joke, untrue, didn't happen, ect... Nadda, not yet anyway. He had 5 brainstem strokes that doctors say 1 shoulda killed him but he fought 5 and won. He was doing well and maybe one day coulda recooped. But in August he had a heart atttack after a yelling incident with our daughter's ex-husband and my husband's sister. He said he felt guilty that he couldn't jump up and kick him out for talking to his sister that way and I suppose the stress from it caused his heart attack the next day. So hospital and more down time. Then I ran out of help at home and had to put him in nusring home and daughter tried to kidnap him from nursing home while I was in hospital myself. Next day I got out and before I could get to him he went to ER with heart attack again and could not win this one. So I feel essentially daughter killed him. And her reason to kidnap him was that she wanted his SSI check. Like that would just assure her to get it. All it was is 674 a month. Crazy girl. I thought at first I would focus on her instead of his death like I know people do. But I haven't. She doesn't exhist for my world any more. But I still wonder if it has really hit me yet about his death. I don't sit and cry and be depressed all day like most people do. I miss him and I want him back but not with the pain he had and not wih the emotional conflict she put him through. I try not to think about him and if I do I certainly think of happy times. I keep telling myself I don't have anyhing to feel guilty of and that is why I don't cry. Sometimes I wish I could cry though...
At 7:54pm on January 4, 2010, halfaheart said…
JC Im so sorry for your pain.And shame on anyone and everyone that is causing it.They need to see that you need consoled as well.

God is with you....let Him in.
At 1:49am on December 5, 2009, JCarol said…
im so hurt
 
 
 

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