I am so sorry Joanne.  It's a terrible ordeal you are struggling with.  I wish you some peace but I know how hard that is.  I also know the special bond between a grandma and grandson.  My mom died last month and I lost my son 3 weeks ago.  Both are so hard but my mom was 91 and lived a full and wonderful life.  My son was only 20 and left this world way too soon.  I hope you have faith in your life and can lean on that faith that things will work out.   Although you may not think the police are helping, so many things take way longer than they should.  I hope you are honest with all you know and the right people are brought to justice.   Your little grandson is watching you and would want you to do whatever you can for him.   Don't be hard on yourself.  Wish I could help with your pain.  We are all hurting.  I wish there weren't so many in pain on this site but maybe in some way it can help that you know you are not alone.  I will keep you in my prayers.