I am so glad you came here. It has helped me so much over these past 7 months. I have been where you are...in a fog, wanting to die, feeling like you will die. But I promise you you will heal with time and with support. I am so glad…"
I've been quiet lately but I have still been on here reading everyone's comments and they are so touching. I love reading about the signs from your loved ones as well as your experiences with the dreams. Deborah P I am so…"
"Marsha and Deborah,
Thank you both so much for validating my feelings about the holidays. I am just realizing they will be harder than I thought. Halloween was always kind of our holiday. When we were younger we'd go out and as we got older we…"
I just wanted to come on here and reach out and say hi. I have been noticing everyone has been having difficulties with their family, especially as the holidays are upon us. I am lucky that I am so close with my husband's family…"
Thank you so much for that recommendation. I actually ended up getting that today on the kindle and I also got the journal that goes along with it! This seems like it will be really helpful. Thanks!"
"Thank you Sara. You made me laugh when you talk about yelling at your friends and family in your head so you don't tell them to F off. Luckily, my close family and friends seem to really understand except for the occasional moments (and I feel…"
"I know you want "you" back and I want "me" back too. Our old selves are in there somewhere. But we will be changed. I know it feels so unnatural to feel so sad all of the time. Its so terrible and exhausting. To be sad for 5…"
"Hey everyone, I just wanted to share this with you. My husband, Brian, was such a talented photographer. I wanted to share his photography website that we are keeping up and running as long as possible. He had gotten really into "street"…"
"Steve, keep us posted on the thyroid. I am so sorry its acting up. Thyroid stuff runs in my family too.
Sara, beautifully said. Deborah, also, to quote my therapist, "Fragility= love. Its the only thing that can break us." Your grief is…"
"Deborah, It's only been 5 months (your husband died in May right?). I know you are in so much pain and you want relief from it but you gotta give yourself a break. It is still so early. I wish I could relieve your pain. Just know we are all…"
Oh boy, I can relate to everything you are saying to a T. I mentioned my fatigue in the discussion but in addition I am literally scared of everything. I am a nervous wreck. I FINALLY visited a psychiatrist on Thursday…"
I know you are feeling alone. I'm feeling very alone and sad tonight too. It doesn't matter if people are around or not, we are lonely without our husbands. :-( I know you want to be in his arms. Just keep reminding yourself that…"
Thanks for ur sharing, I know very well the pain u must be going thru, without writing a book here basically the same thing happened to me on 8/1/2017 only the ages were different our bdays were one day apart and the situation was a little different we lived together for over 2 yrs and i needed hip surgery very bad and he had a heart attack when i was supposed to hv the surgery they thought he was going to die i went with my hip so bad and wss there evetyday at the hosp cancelled my surgery needless to say a miracle happened he got off the vrntilator blamed me for his heart attack and i could not believe that he wud wake up so cruel and mean. I knew we werent getting along so good but when he had that heart attack it seemed every fight, every hurt every pain was so not importannt anymore that all that mattered to me was him and even prayed that God take my life for his i still loved him so much and wud sit at his side for hrs kissing him talking to him kissing his hands and even the nurses told me u better have that hip fixed or u will end up in a wheelchair forever hes going to need lots of rehab and work but a miracle did happen he got off the ventilator and was home and driving within a week and me, my hip got so bad i cud not even make it to the elevatrs and cud not pick him up or visit the last few days but did finally get the surgery but it was a very long recovery had to stay in the city going from place to place because he said he took me off the lease cause he owed back rent and cud not get help with rent if i was still on thr lesse anyway i finally did get to go back upstate and was told i cud only stay for one day per mgr and he was taking care of my cats that was the last time i saw him everytime i wanted to come there it was another story and in the end i ran out of people to stay with and needed physical therapy so bad because i wasnt healing right all because i was all over the place and cud only go back upstate this time for one day get all my stuff and cats and drive back the same day which was completly impossible not having help like before my hip was stilll not in great shape and that wud hv been insane driving back and forth about 600 miles i eventually got the physical therapy i needed went to a assisted living place that was really an adult home/shelter, psych unit, jail with residents that had so many issues and the place was so dangerous i begged him to let me come back all this time and he only got more and more nasty cruel threatening and told me to come back but get my stuff and leave the same day telling me to sleep iin the car the street and i never knew why he turned into such a cruel insane man according to him he said i used his debit card when he was in the hosp to buy food cause there wasnt any in the house after sitting with him over 14 hrs the first day and then needed help my hip got so bad my friend from work came and helped me stayed with me went shopping for me so i paid her 100.00 ordered in once bought food from supermarket and took her out to eat. All my money was gone brcause thr first day he was in hosp i was so nervous i cudnt rvrn drive took a cab there and back that cost 200 plus put in money for some bills and he told oeople i stole from him blamed me for having his car towed because i did stop paying my half he nrver let me drive it didnt put me on lease or insurance and after a few months i said why am i paying for a car i cant even drive, but right from the hosp i sent 500.00 for the car but it was towed anyway and whatever he said to his family and mgmt put me on their bad side but all of a sudden i got ths phone call that he passed away the night before i literally tried to rent a car but everything was booked at last minute too amtrack that took 7 hrs to get there got to the apt was given 10 mins to get everything including my 2 cats, they were all i cud manage snd nvr got to say goodbye to him to see him to go to his funeral & the worst was i still loved him so much