Karen W
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At 7:16am on June 5, 2014, Elvira Castellanos said…

Hello Karen, just checking in, shouldn't ask because I know, but how are you?

At 5:08pm on May 28, 2014, Elvira Castellanos said…

No apologies needed Karen, praying for you so that you can make it thru your birthday without too much heartache, was off today, so went to get my hair done, cried while sitting at the chair, cried some more when I got home while cooking, what can I say, I know you understand, never cried so much in my life, my son had a talk with me today, said I have to dig really deep to get out of this depression, said he has not accepted his father's death but has made peace with the fact that he needs to realize he will not be coming back & that we all need to go on without his presence although always remembering him with love, it is different for them, their lives will go on but ours ceased to be the way we were used to & their is no future to look forward to any longer, yes I will be a grandma this year but that also makes me think that he would have also wanted to be here to enjoy being a grandpa, my emotions are mixed, happy but at the same time, missing him more & more.

Prayers & hugs to you,

Elvira

At 7:28pm on May 27, 2014, Elvira Castellanos said…

Well Karen, the weekend was as I expected, very hard & horrible, could not wait for today to come, so I could go back to work, did some things my husband loved which made it even tougher, we went to his favorite winery & bought his favorite wine, then walked around in Peddler's Village without him, I still think he is coming back, I just sometimes try to imagine that he is away on business & will come back, I can't accept this horrible loss, my sister is worried because she says at this point my health is being compromised, nauseous all the time & crying all the time.

I hate to say it, but dreading my son's wedding day, I will be so happy for him but need to control my sadness for that day so I don't ruin his day, because it wouldn't be fair to him or his future wife, sorry just rambling on & on, I know you totally understand.

Hope you are a little better.

Hugs & Prayers,

Elvira

 
 
 

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