My heart goes out to you. I cry and pray for everyone who has lost someone. It is such a painful ordeal.
I am a hospice nurse and I deal with death and dying everyday but nothing prepares you for this. I cry for my patients and I pray for relief that they can go on peacefully. I know God has got them. We as family and friends want them here with us but God does have an alternate plan.
It is never gonna become easy we just learn to adapt to the situation.
I find something everyday that makes me think of my son. Sometimes I cry sometimes I smile but I have to say thank you God for allowing me to have been able to share in that precious persons life and how much it enhanced mine.
Be blessed and give ti to God!