It’s hard for me to say no. With the best of intentions, many people want to keep me busy. It’s their “cure” for my missing Joe. I, too, thought I must get involved, and my calendar is filled. What I really need is more time to be alone and let myself grieve.



I’m saying no to:





Potluck suppers. I don’t feel like preparing food or making small talk. I would rather stay home with a good book.



Singles groups. The members are…

Last January I was a complete washout! I allowed a disturbing telephone conversation with a family member to push me into deep depression. Any thoughts of evaluating my past year and making resolutions were abandoned. So I’ve chosen TODAY as my New Year’s Day instead. I take stock of my life.



WHERE HAVE I BEEN? I’ve been to the bottom! Those periods of deep mourning for Joe were the absolute pits. I went through it, as I knew I had to, but thank God the worst is…

The man coming toward me on the street looked like Joe. I stood staring, my breath coming in little gasps. He was tall and thin. He even walked like Joe. He passed me at the corner. It certainly was not my husband. The tears came. What I wouldn’t give to see Joe walking toward me again!



Joe, I remember you:



Coming up the steps to the deck with an armload of firewood.



Bending over the saw in your workshop.



Sitting in your chair, hands held…

Ideas for Getting to Sleep and Surviving the Long Nights



I can pretend during the daytime that Joe is away, working outside or in his workshop. Alone for the evening meal and crawling into an empty bed confirm the worst! The loneliness for him descends like a shroud and there is no escape. What do I do to get to sleep easier? And what about those long hours in the middle of the night when I wake and can’t get back to sleep?



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