Mary Beth Ouanes
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  • United States
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At 10:20am on February 9, 2010, Charles said…
My wife and I had a total, honest marriage.I told her that to be careful, but if she found that right man the first week after I was gone to go for it.Never worry what the kids are anyone would think.
I have found a dear friend, she also has lost her soul mate.We are going along this long road to see where it may lead us.Dead end maybe, But we will not know unless we do travel the road.
I have not told my grown children yet,, Its really none of their business.I will tell them soon.I hope they will be happy for me.
How funny about that first real kiss.Your words are my words.
My wife was one of the most beautiful, extraordinary women I ever knew.I have to learn to accept new people on their own and not compare them to her.She fought M.S with so much courage for 13 years and I was with her all the way.
I heard my wife say a million times--LIFE GOES ON, LIVE IT.
Good luck to you.I feel that your new friend as well as your husband are very lucky men.
Thank you again,, Charles
At 7:29am on February 9, 2010, Charles said…
Hi Mary Beth,
Because of my wife I do have so much love I need to give.I never want to forget my love or any memories of her and us.I just want to be happy as she wanted me to.
What about guilt?How do you handle the feeling you are being unfaithful?
I do wonder if we are more comfortable with someone that also has lost that soul mate, or is better to be with someone who has not lost that someone.
I also wonder how many people here swear they can never love again but later find themselves with a new love.Do they come back here and tell their story?
Also we all ignore the elephant in the room,, Sex,
No love, no sex for the rest of our lives?
My wife loved me and wanted me to find new love.I sure would have wanted the same for her.
At 6:38am on February 9, 2010, Mary Beth Ouanes said…
Hi Charles:

I couldn't agree more with you that more people need to come forward on this topic. I have had hard time finding any others or info. on this subject. My new friend is my biggest resource because he too is greiving the loss of his wife. We talk about our grief and where were at. This topic that is deep and intense have brought us together and it's not all about grief and tears.

When you have so much love to give and have been part of a successful relationship you have the tools to need to be needed, loved and to love. It will happen in time, when you least suspect it.

You will never forget your soul mate if you keep some of your traditions about of your on going life. That's what we have done but we have also incorporated some of our own. For us, it's so important to not forget our partners because they have contributed to our hearts and brought us together.

I wish you peace and comfort through this never ending journey.
At 10:06pm on February 8, 2010, Charles said…
Hi, Charles here.
Thank you so much for your honest reply to my post..Is new love possible?I think more healing woud come about if more people like you woud come forward and show that life is possible after the loss of your soul mate.I am still greiving and in pain but I am trying so hard to move forward.I do not want to forget my lost soul mate at all, I just want to remember all the good times we had.
I love your statement, My heart has room for my husband as well as my new friend.I hope to be more like you soon. Again thank you. Charles

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