Mary Packer ... Sorry, can't find your message here, but got it in my email. I do understand anxiety and it's very normal when grieving. When upset our muscles tense up without us even realizing it. Restless sleep to our shoulders up to our ears because of the trauma of losing a spouse causes all those aches and pains. I went through it as well.
Xanax is good for anxiety, but be sure that your doctor only puts you on it for a short-term as they are extremely addictive. I know because my doctor didn't and now after years of taking it to ward of panic attacks I can't get off it especially because of my age (75.)
You can also go to a pharmacy as ask for a lotions physiotherapists use here for massage for joint and muscle pain and it's called, 'P3 ... muscle and joint pain.' It has a strong mint smell and other good things in it such as Eucalyptus and it works wonders. I use it and got a bottle of it for a friend of mine who was in a car accident and she said it works so well. Hope this helps.
Please keep coming back for Legacy and let us know how you are doing.
I am very sorry that you are now a member of Legacy, but at least, it's a very compassionate site to be a part of. It wasn't me who left you that message, maybe Marsha.
To retrieve a message one good way is to find the notification for the message and click on the thread. At least, that's how I do it.
As it so happens, I am one of those widows who experience an enormous amount of aches and pains following the death of their spouse. I am joint and muscle pain that sometimes become unbearable. I see a chiropractor once a month and also get therapeutic massages as often as I can afford. Having to deal with physical chronic pain following bereavement is another added injury to our already compromised state. Hope you find something that works for you.
Wishing you peace at this exceeding difficult time.