Michelle Murphy
  • Female
  • Garden City, ID
  • United States
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Long Saturday

Posted on April 23, 2011 at 2:57pm 0 Comments

I find myself hating the weekends at least at work my mind is busy and I only stop and think about Steven and my dad a thousand times but at home every thought is on them the chair he sat in,the table we ate at. Maybe I should move but then that would be sad it seems there is nothing that can be done.

3/31/2011

Posted on April 21, 2011 at 5:04pm 0 Comments

I lost my husband on March 31st of this year not only did I loose him I feel like I lost half of me. He was my best friend,my soul mate I feel so lost. Will this can this get better please HELP

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At 8:37am on July 30, 2011, Sheryl McCormick said…

Hi Michelle - I read your post that your husband had CF.  I have two grandchildren with CF.  They are ages 9 and 11.  Our son and my grandchildren live here with me.  My daughter-in-law died almost 6 years ago (she didn't have CF though she had Graves disease and died after surgery to remove her appendix).  After she died we had our son and the grandkids move in so we could help with their care.  My husband was taking the grandkids to school on 11/5/2010 and ended up in an accident with a semi.  He died but the kids are okay and didn't get hurt. 

I just felt that I needed to reach out to you and first of all thank you for being willing to reach out to someone with CF and take the risk of loving them and marrying them even knowing you may not have a long future together.  I hope my grandchildren will find someone like that someday. I wish they were further along with the new medications they are working on so that your husband's life might have been prolonged.  We are also very involved with the CF foundation and we have a benefit every year.  I am sorry you have had trials with your in laws.  My son has had some of that too with his former in-laws.  It is almost like they feel it is his fault Crystal died.  She was only 24 when she died and he was also 24.  He is now 30.  I too find work to be a distraction and weekends harder.  I am 54 so although I feel like I am a younger widow - I guess I am old when I compare myself to you.  May God continue to be with you and comfort you - prayers of hope going up for you.

Sheryl McCormick

At 12:42pm on April 25, 2011, Christy said…

Michelle, so sorry for your losses. Drugs & alcohol- yep, those seem to be the most common answers- even my close family & friends- Christians- suggest those things might help! I can't believe it. I have to much respect for my husband to bow to those things, yet I completely understand why others go that route. Suicide- never, but again, I would not condemn  the soul who suffered as we are, to have given up. It's really almost impossible at times. I am so thankful for my God & his word. For me, I have found a purpose & that is I am really the only person alive who knew Larry & can share him with his son, more & more as he grows. He just turned 13 yrs. & there are alot of things he should know but is not ready for. I just try to encourage him in the right things as his dad would want. I used to live to make Larry happy, but now I live to honor him. I am the opposite of you though when it comes to work. Larry & I worked together for 7 1/2 yrs. so it is especially difficult to be at work, but I have to stay another 1 1/2 before I am "vested" for retirement. I don't know what I'll do for income if/when I leave. Nothing is certain any more. as for wondering if it gets any better I have to say I am getting  more use to being alone, yet I continue to miss him just as much & perhaps more with each new day. It has been almost 8 months for me & I still haven't accepted that he will never be back. Crazy.

I wish you the best & remember to take things as they come- stay in the present! Peace & Hugs, Christy

At 11:54am on April 22, 2011, Michelle Murphy said…

Thank you all so much it does help to be able to talk to others going through this even though I wish none of us were. I lost my husband two days before his 36th birthday and even though I knew I would loose him early it still hit me like a ton of bricks I am still supprised by how in denial I was of his disease. Again thank you all and I'm so sorry for your losses as well.

                               Michelle

At 8:03pm on April 21, 2011, Joann Vienneau said…
I can relate, as we all can i guess. I just lost my partner Bill on March 23, it isn't any easier for me, harder i find, coming up on the one month mark, feels like yesterday
At 7:13pm on April 21, 2011, Pete Bronson said…

Michele,

I am so sorry for your loss, I know your pain all too well, I lost my wife of almost 30 years to Cancer 2 days after Thanksgiving after a very short battle. She took her last breath in my arms, I have not been right since then, nothing seems to help at this point. She would have been 56 this January. I have never known a time in my adult life with out her. I feel so alone even in a room full of people.

 

I wish I could offer something more encouraging but I have not experienced it yet myself. May god bless you on this unfortunate journey.

 
 
 

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