Posted on January 10, 2012 at 1:00am
I lost my husband two years ago and he was and is the love of my life....I'm lonely and still hurting ...want to feel love again and meet a good man...but my husband is a hard act to follow. Every guy I end up not liking have no chemistry and wondering if I should just give up....I will always be in love with my husband and miss him and I wonder how I could ever move on with another man or even know what he should look like to me. I have a lot of love left to give to a worthy man. I hope God… Continue
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No, it isn't you. What I can tell you is this, don't "look" for Joel -- he is there with you. During the initial shock of the death we try too hard to find something that will give us a sign that the person is nearby because we miss them so very much and are in denial that they are not here anymore. When we do that we actually miss the signs they are leaving for us. It is natural to "look" for a sign and in time you will relax more and the signs will appear out of nowhere and at the strangest times! I get little clues every day now. It took me about 6 months to stop "looking" for that special sign that my Douglas is still here spiritually. The feathers, Nancy, the feathers are my sign that Douglas is here with me. He has new wings and is undoubtedly flapping them around and losing feathers to let me know that he is watching over me. He has helped me find my keys on numerous occasions (I was and still am losing keys), he has helped me with direction while driving around parts unknown, and I start to feel depressed something unusual and funny happens to snap me out of that. What you are going through is natural and painful. God does not give us anything we cannot endure, Nancy. Remember that and as each day goes by you will become more able to understand the "why" and move forward. Take your memories of Joel with you. You will never forget him and there is a special love for him that only you know. I have that same special love for Douglas and that is something no one can take from me -- not even his death! Write to me anytime. I will be thinking of you and wishing you the very best -- always!
Hugs and peace,
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