Dear Shirley,

I wanted to say I'll be thinking of you and hoping that good memories of your children bring you some peace amidst the terrible pain you must be in.

My son Liam died on New Year's eve and I never thought I could go on. But I did and I'm still here six years later. Still, this period is the most painful. I don't why dates and seasons make us feel worse - I think it is because of what we expect a certain day to be. For example, a birthday or Christmas / holiday season should be spent in celebrating as others are doing. But it won't be that way for us.

Do what you feel is best for you, even if that means crying most of the time, or resting, or never getting out of bed etc. Just give yourself permission to do what your body and mind needs. Maybe just spend it looking at your children's pictures or talking to them. That way, you will be with them in spirit. No-one else understands. But you don't need to fulfill others' expectations, only your own.

Much love and compassion,

Esther (Liam's mom)

My heart and prayers go out to you, my parents lost boh of my sisters in a auto accident when i was 2 i was in the vehicle and the only surviror.  I know how hard it was for them losing 2 children they both are gone now, but I take what I can remember them saying and hold on to that to get thru each day, yes christmas will never be the same for any of us, I would just like to sleep the day thru but we all know we can't so we just take a step at a time and lean on anyone who can help and this site really helps alot.

Good luck tommorrow and I pray that God somehow can give us all some kind of peace at least for one day.

Terri Jonathan's mom

My heart and prayers go out to you, my parents lost boh of my sisters in a auto accident when i was 2 i was in the vehicle and the only surviror.  I know how hard it was for them losing 2 children they both are gone now, but I take what I can remember them saying and hold on to that to get thru each day, yes christmas will never be the same for any of us, I would just like to sleep the day thru but we all know we can't so we just take a step at a time and lean on anyone who can help and this site really helps alot.

Good luck tommorrow and I pray that God somehow can give us all some kind of peace at least for one day.

Terri Jonathan's mom