Steve Cain
  • 59, Male
  • Aurora, IL
  • United States

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Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Hi Sara Not so much that I have more ambition, Seeing that I'm retired it gives me something to do. If I was working none of this would be getting done. I even have time to take a nap most days."
23 hours ago
Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Gretchen ...  I am so happy to hear you and Ethan and had to giggle about your 'kid' crying on Santa's lap.  It reminded me when my Goddaughter Emily was about 5 years old and I took her up to see Santa.  She sat…"
Barbara joined Steve Cain's group

Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.
Gretchen G commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Marsha - hope you get the squirrel out soon!! This past weekend was a busy-ish one for me. Took Ethan to see the lights at the zoo on Saturday night with some friends and then got my "kid crying on Santa's lap" picture of him the…"
Sara Murphy commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Hi Deb,   I'm trying to catch up on my reading here.  I just read your post about Bob visiting you while you were working in the dining room.  What a fantastic experience and proof that our loved ones are always by our…"
Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Deb S ...  Thanks so much Deb.  However, some things are still not working out well.  I never see my Great-niece and she is growing like a little weed.  It's my nephew's little girl and he and his girlfriend live just…"
Deb S commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Sarah, Like Marsha, I commend you for attending this party. I hope that Harold's observation proved correct and the anticipation was worse than the event. How did it go?  Debbie"
Deb S commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Marsha, I am so relieved and happy for you that issues have improved with your SIL and Christmas is on again. Your yesterday sounds wonderful. Thank goodness for our pets. They are indeed special gifts from God. How are you feeling physically? Have…"
Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Harold ...  I knew you would understand about the dogs; my saving grace.  The tree is all lit up tonight and they are playing together and having a good old time so I got down on the rug and played with them and that was sure a bonus…"
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Sara  Hope your Party was tolerable and maybe a few smiles and laugh or two. I have found like Marsha said sometimes the anticipation is the worst and the event isn't too bad. Hope your finding some way to make the Holidays your own and…"
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Marsha Glad you are feeling better and things are better as far as Christmas for you. The fact that you prayed for your sister in law shows what a sweetheart you are. Might be a band aid on the problem but at least it's some progress. My dogs…"
Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Sara ...  I am proud of you for even attempting to go to the Christmas Party.  Try to put things into perspective; you know most of the people at the party and if you should bump into that couple that you haven't seen since Ken's…"
Sara Murphy commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"So I'm preparing to go to an annual Christmas party and am kind of dreading it.  Our friends have had their party the first Saturday of December for the past 25 years.  Most of the people at the party I've seen during the year…"
Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Harold ...  I am so happy that your grandson and you will be together and you are doing things together.  There is nothing more blessed than bright eyed children excited with anticipation and believing in magic.  I often think we…"
Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Deb ...  To answer your question as to what I'm doing on the weekend, I'm taking my two dogs to get Santa pictures done as Ernie and I did every year because it raises donations for rescued dogs.  They look so cute and don't…"
Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Dear Sara ...  As promised I'm letting you know that I had told my sister-in-law I was not engaging in any arguments and ruining everyone's Christmas.  I realized to pray for her in hopes whatever she was going through would…"

Profile Information

Just a quick note to thank you all for supporting each other. When I started this I would have NEVER thought this group would grow this big and have the amount of activity that it does. It's great to see you all supporting and helping each other. With 3 jobs it is hard to spend as much time as I'd like but it's good to know I don't have to spend a lot of time here administering things. Just remember I'm around if you need me. When something gets posted I do get an email and I will respond as soon as I get that. Thank you all for taking care of each other and remembering your loved ones here.

Comment Wall (104 comments)

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At 11:08am on June 18, 2015, Cynthia Murphy said…

It has been a while since I have been here. My husband died 19 months ago after 17years of suffering from diabetes related problems. I didn't think I would ever get better but I have. Eight months into a horrible grief a friend called and asked me to come over, her brother was there. I dated her brother in high school. He had lost one of his sons in 2001 and grieving as much as I was. We've had so many discussions about what we have been through and where we are now.. We are dating now and loving life again. We still talk about our loved ones we lost but we remember with smiles and happy memories. I don't know what the future holds for me but I have to trust that God is leading me in the direction that was meant to be for the second half of my life.

At 2:19pm on September 1, 2014, Karen W said…

Joyce, welcome to the site.  I'm so sorry for your loss.  I lost my husband Ed almost 9 months ago and I have found myself back at this site often looking for comfort, encouragement, understanding, or just to vent my feelings.  Everyone here has been where you and I are and understands what we are going through.   I wish you strength for each new day. 

At 10:45am on September 1, 2014, Joyce M said…

I too am new to this site...and am not sure how to post a comment...I have read so many comments by others and have found some small measure of comfort knowing that what I am going thru is so normal...I lost my husband just 3 weeks ago and every day is so hard right now....

At 9:44am on May 26, 2013, Jan said…
How do I talk to people on this site? I posted and did a blog and no one responded. Maybe I didn't do it correctly.
At 9:02pm on December 7, 2012, Babs said…
I just realized I posted
I have read others post and it seems no matter whether the loss of our loved one is recent or years ago What I am feeling is what others have posted
I feel a large piece of my heart died when he did I feel like I have to be another person at work and then go home to our home we shared for 45 years and feel so alone I just crawl in bed and zone out to movies or sleep When I think about how much I miss him and being there when he took his last breath it's like I have to put my feelings away because its too hard to deal with them. I get mad then sad and cry I just want to go to sleep and wake up and he is back home with me. The question I have is I feel bad when other family members call with problems they are having or if they are sick. I feel like I can't handle it or be sympathetic and say the wrong thing to them. I really don't want to talk to others I feel bad I can't listen to there problems Does anyone else feel this way. I have always been the strong one helped others and was able to fix my problems. This grieving I can't fix me. I know everyone says it takes time but this is the worst thing to go thru and I don't feel I will ever be me again. I married Mike when I was 18. Moved from my patents house to be Mikes wife then became a mother and now 45 yrs later alone. I was always a wife and a mother never a me I don't know how to be me. Mike and I were friends too and did everything together I really don't have friends Sorry my post is so long. Mikes birthday is coming up then Xmas. Thanks for listening
At 8:40pm on December 7, 2012, Babs said…
Hi. I am new here how do I post a question My husband of 45 years passed away 10 months ago tonight I don't feel it will ever be better I miss so much. GOD BLESS EVERYONE
At 2:35am on September 13, 2012, Marilyn kroge said…
I am facing the 1st anniversary of the loss of my beloved Jim and I still can't accept that I am alone for the first time since I was 18 years old, almost 50 years with the same man and my only love. I wake in the night to sounds that I realize are coming from my very soul. I find myself calling out to him, begging him to please come back to me, that I can't go on without him and I can't stop the tears that won't stop and I don't want to stop the pain I feel because that would make it real, it would mean that I finally know that I will never feel his arms around me, that I'll never kiss him goodbye when he left each morning. This man I met for the first time and we knew that first meeting that love at first sight really happened and we were together from that moment until I kissed him and felt his last breath, warm and so amazing that I felt his breath as he closed his eyes and so quietly left me forever . I know how maudlin my words sound but I so need to finally tell someone of my pain. I'm not allowed to say any of this to my sons or anyone in my family. Their grief became anger and so this has been my life, alone and terribly hurt that no one wants to hear what I've said here where I feel safe sharing my deepest thoughts. Thank you......."m"
At 9:13pm on September 12, 2012, Margie Thrash said…

I am coming up on my second month without my rock (Scott) it is hard but I do have good friends that check up on me every night if I dont contact them so I am fortunate that way.  Had to already go thru his birthday without him was very hard to do.  Then we always did a 100 mile horse ride week of labor day did it this year by myself with a few friends and was hard but I did it.  Not a day goes by I dont cry.  One of his last text to me was please dont get depressed like I am right now (he had 3 months to live from diagnosis made it 3 1/2).  So I try to think of that text everytime it gets too bad and I go outside or work around the house and listen to alot of music.

At 2:21am on January 10, 2012, Rowe said…

Welcome to all new members. I Lost my first husband 31 yrs ago at the age of 38. Remaried 6 yrs later and lost my Late husband after 10 yrs. He has been gone for 15 years. I am living proof that after the grief, Life will go on.  Not at first, but about 5 yrs later you will be living again.. even though you thought it would never happen. I Recommend that you do not try to avoid the grief.. you have to deal with it because if you dont it will be waiting for you to come back. I am here for you if you need to vent, or just want someone to give you an ear.

At 5:40am on December 15, 2011, dawn m long said…

hi steve only a few more days till christmas .. Im here for ya

 luv dawn


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