Sue, I am so sorry for your loss and even sorrier you have to join us on the roller coaster ride called grief. You have come to a good site where we are all grieving and all in different stages of grief. You will soon see you feelings are normal there are no timeframes and it is about you now. It is truly a baby step process where some days you will take one step forward and 2 steps back. Take your time and come here often. Hugs, Jane P.