Tracey L Howlett
  • Female
  • Bloomfield, NM
  • United States
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Bryans Dance

Playing with the BullMy beautiful baby passed from this life on Jan. 27, 2008. He was 17 years old. He died from a tragic accident. He loved life so much! He had more energy than I could have ever dreamed about. He loved people and was always on the go. He really didn't care much for school except for the social activities involved!!! His passion was his rodeo bull fighting. He had just become a professional cowboy protector bull fighter on Dec. 5,2007. He loved being in the arena playing with those darn bulls! He was also an avid hunter, he loved going to the woods and hunting, he could spy a deer or an elk from hundereds of yards away. Bryan Roper I love and miss you more than my heart can say! I know that you are up in that arena in Heaven having one heck of a rodeo with all of your buddies. I love and miss you so much son!!! We lived in Co. when Bryan passed away and I have to tell you all that since 2004 we have lost 14 young people in our area to tragic accidents. At the cemetary where Bryan is layed to rest he is right by 3 of his dear friends that were killed in a car accident a little less than a year from when Bryan passed away. My friend lost both of her children in that accident. Now all 4 of our children are resting next to each other!

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At 4:17am on March 2, 2011, Melissa Asher said…

Good morning,

 I hope that helped a little, it did me just know that Samantha will be able to watch your son, Made my day that was one of the things I promised her I would take was a rodeo and never did. I will go soon, I have done everything she wanted to do from parasailing to deep sea fishing, I am trying to finish up some of the things she did not do for her.


I am so glad you are making friend on this site there are a lot of wonderful people and we all know your pain, every body situtation is a little different the out come is the same.


Just keep faith, you don't have to be strong all the time you are aloud to get mad.


Your new friend Melissa



At 8:49pm on March 1, 2011, Melissa Asher said…



Your son sound like he was a wonderful person he is still a wonderful soul,, and yes he enjoying his rodeo, Samantha always wanted to go to one,, so I sure she has got a ring seat. she was a country girl among other things, she died at the age of 18, she slip in the bath tub and bump her head and drowned i brought her back and she saved two lives with her kidneys. it will be four years oct, and it seems like yesterday, I have not been able to go thru her clothes and a friend of mine that Samantha knew well is dieing of cancer, she was a sz 12 and now she is down to a 1 Samantha was 3 to a 0 she work out she wanted to be a cop, and she was a model, she was only 5' 4" but today I was able to go thru all her clothes I gave them to pat her modeling dresses,,Pat's doc said she could go on a cruz and she is going to sit at the cabin's table, she has 6 months to a year to live, it felt so right giving her those clothes I did not cry when I touch them I felt joy like Samantha said this is what I was waiting for. :) Sorry for rambling just  thought I would share

At 7:44pm on March 1, 2011, Vicki Vazquez said…
Yes, I read many books about losing a child, and they said 75 % of marraiges end in divorce after losing a child.  Your son is beautiful. God Bless you all. Vicki V.
At 12:49pm on February 28, 2011, Susan - Donny's Mom said…

The "warning" post I did was sent out to "everyone" in our Loss of a Child.  These posts only show on email messages.  They don't go on everyones page.  Just so you don't wonder all day.  Sometimes it is confusing on the website to "comment back" so I just usually click on the person's picture and go to their page to make a comment.  When someone sends a "message to the whole group", no one can comment back on that.  You have to look up the person who sent the message and then click on their page.  There is a listing of everyone in our group on the main page (right side)  you have to "view all" then put their name in the search square and their page will come up.  Hope this helps....once you get the hang of it it works good.

Hugs to you and your family!


At 12:33pm on February 28, 2011, shannon churchill said…

I need to see a picture to believe anything anymore.  I hope it is someone who really cares,but you never know. 

At 12:33pm on February 28, 2011, shannon churchill said…

I need to see a picture to believe anything anymore.  I hope it is someone who really cares,but you never know. 

At 11:30am on February 28, 2011, Susan - Donny's Mom said…

Tracey....the other day I posted a "to all members" message to beware of this person - Monica.  I noticed her message on someone else's page.  Every once in awhile people come into our wonderful website and prey on unsuspecting people for personal email information.  Pretty sad that people would stoop so low but it happens.  Always go with your gut feeling on a message and never give your personal info to anyone unless you have gotten to know them and trust their friendship.

I have been on this site for 14+ months and this is the 4th person trying to do this.  We all kinda watch out for each other and give warnings.

Your young son Bryan looks so happy in his picture enjoying his cowboy life.  We can all hope he is in heaven riding the angel bulls.  So sorry for your loss and hope you find peace and friends on this great website.

Susan   Donny's Mom

At 5:15pm on February 27, 2011, Jackie Jones said…
thank you for your words.  it seems like everyday right now is a struggle.  it is such a rollercoaster of emotions.  i have a friend in town that i talk to that can relate to the loss of a child.  her daughter and my son were friends and her daughter died two years ago and she reached out ot me to help me through this.  thank god if not im not sure if i could believe that it may not get easier but it does become bearable is what i hear.  which in it self is so awful. 
At 3:01pm on February 27, 2011, Carrie L said…
Hi Tracey what is that name of that song by rascal flats. I don't know if i can u tube it because I have dial up.. thanks Carrie
At 8:35am on February 3, 2011, Carrie L said…
hi Tracey thanks for your kind words. I need to forgive myself. One day. I am still going through tremendous pain. Part of it is guilt. Regret. Loss... Morgan didn't live with me. I moved from him 4 years prior ...He died. He was so full of life such a good little boy... so spirited. wanted to be with family have get togethers. i was stupid and thought i had forever.He was really on a path that was diferent. I thought he would be ok. I thought he was acting a little weird. but he would be ok. I ignored him the last time i saw him. I had divorce on my mind and he was talking a mile a minute I just wanted a peaceful good time. I ignored him.  He needed me and i didn't act. It would have been better if he had died from something different. it waas tragic horrible and i think he suffered all alone. I was not hafving a good life. just made some terrible mistakes like moving from him Death of my child is the worst thing that has ever happened in my life.  It is so sad and so consuming. I know there will be a time when i have to stop this.  but i have had a lot of time on my hands and perhaps that is a good thing for i feel this is something my mind has to work out.  I have horses. but with morgans death wish i had not ... had spent the money and time with him.  they are what helped me move i thought they were going to make me happy. and yes they give you some happiness but not if you don't have someone to share it with. My son was very unique he will remain with my soul forever. love to you carrie L

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