5 years later...wow! Still miss him, but dealing with the loss does get better. I allowed myself to grieve, to reflect on his life and death, but mostly on his life and how blessed we were to have the time that we had.

 Now I appreciate every single person I know and love even more and make sure to let them know how I feel about them and say I love you every day. I don't waste time on foolish bickering and petty things. I don't wait for holidays to give gifts to show that I care. I love so much more freely and openly and thank God for all of my family and friends who were amazing and supportive during my loss. I was happy to have this site as well and to learn that others were having some of the same thoughts and emotions and could answer the questions that could not be answered by those who meant well, but didn't experience what we all were going through.

I am grateful for all of the good lessons about life and death that came out of that very hard and very sad time. I'm happy now, still blessed and I will see him again someday.