Life is not always easy but I can say it was very fullfilling for me. I had a family that made my life so worth living. We had a deep love for each other. Unfortunately growing up childhood leaves and we grow up and with growing up comes often sorrow and loss. By the time I was 8 It all started and it seemed one after another of either my friends or my relations were passing away some by natural cause, some by accidents, sickness and even death. Life was getting harder but I was sure by the time I was in my 30's that I was meant to experience all the loss I did and in 1995 I lost someone very very close to me probably the most special person in my life my eldest sister. I handled this but felt alone she made me promise to be there for my parents and in 2001 my parents both were begging to be ill I did everything I could to be there for them and in 2003 they both died 1 week after each other. I dont know how today but for some strange reason I did it I was strong and I was able to do everything I had to and I didnt fall apart. I often had dreams that if I lost my parents I couldnt never stand it. Well I did just as I did for all those Ive loved that the good Lord called.
Strangely enough now when someone dies I dont feel bad for them I know they are going to a place so many people I knew and loved will be and that cannot be a bad thing. Here I feel alone but I handle myself but if I were to go tomorrow I dont think anyone should cry for me because I am sure I will be happy to once again see all those I love. Im here now because I have my children and my grandchildren and want to do all I can for them but the happiest times Ive had were those with those who are gone and nothing will ever replace them.