carolyn thompson
  • Female
  • n. charleston, south carolina
  • United States
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At 7:40pm on December 28, 2010, geri said…
HI CAROLYN,YES IT IS SO DEVASTATING,I'M STILL IN BEREAVERMENT.I MISS PAUL SO MUCH.IT JUST DOESN'T SEEM FAIR.I HAVE THREE NIECES THAT ARE  PAUL'S AGE THEY GREW UP CLOSE,WELL, THEY HAVE EACH HAD THERE FIRST CHILD SINCE PAUL HAS DIED.IT MAKES ME VERY SAD.HAVING HAD ONLY ONE CHILD ALSO,THE FEELINGS ARE MUTUAL I'M SURE.MY SON LIVED AND WENT TO COLLEGE IN SO.CAROLINA.I LOVED WHEN I WOULD GO AND VISIT HIM WE ALWAYS HAD A WONDERFUL TIME.OF COURSE THAT IS WHERE HE WAS WHEN I SAW HIM FOR THE LAST TIME.TIME DOESN'T HEAL IN MY OPINION,NOTHING TAKES THERE PLACE.HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN FOR YOU?DO YOU GO TO ANY BEREVERMENT GROUPS? GERI  
At 5:49am on December 22, 2010, carolyn thompson said…

Well, another Christmas without my sweet son. I sort of wish I wasn't here either, life is so damn hard. I feel like if just for a moment I could put my broken heart away and truely realize how much I do have to be thankful for. My 70 year old mother sure shouldn't have to see me in a casket. My 78 year old father is blind, crippled and can never see me like I had to view my only child. People pity me in their own way, I really don't want their pity....I want my son back. I feel broken and alone in a world full of people that want to help me through this nightmare. Can anyone really grasp the concept of GONE? Not coming back? Never to be see or heard from again? I wish I could just slap the shit out of all those parents who see their child calling and refuse to answer the phone, "oh they just want something" is what they say...How I long for my son to phone and ask me for anything, it would be my pleasure to do anything just once more for him.I'm so happy I shared Christmas with my child, just driving through the James Island County Park watching the lights, then stopping for hot chocolate and the smores over the fire. I look at the children out by the fire now and wonder how they view their time with their parents, or is another moment of just getting through, not getting screamed at for dropping their marshmellow or spilling their cocoa, or genuinely a good family time? I hate all those people right now. I wish I could simply be happy.My 21 year marriage ended just 9 months before losing Peter. I blame his Dad everyday. I lost my home, husband, child, job, and everything that mattered {or so I thought} in a matter of the time it took to actually carry my child.

 

At 7:15pm on August 17, 2010, Phil's Mamama said…
I continue to think of you.
Philips Mamma
Diane Dillon
Greensboro, NC
At 11:59am on August 9, 2010, geri said…
DEAR CAROLYN,HI MY NAME IS GERI, AND I ALSO LOST MY ONLY CHILD.MY SON PAUL.HE WAS 23,A SENIOR AT COASTAL CAROLINA UNIVERSITY,IN SOUTH CAROLINA.HE LOVED LIFE TO THE FULLEST.I MISS HIM SO MUCH.I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE WITHOUT HIM.HE WAS SO ALIVE,SO FULL OF LIFE.HE HAS SO MANY COUSINS AND FRIENDS, WHOSE COMPANY, I STILL FIND SO HARD TO BE AROUND.THEY LOVE AND MISS HIM SO MUCH.THEY WERE ALWAYS TOGETHER.PAUL DIED ON MARCH,23,2008.EASTER SUNDAY OF THAT YEAR.HE WAS ON SPRING BREAK IN FLORIDA WITH HIS FRIENDS WHEN A CAR,(DRIVEN BY A JUDGE NO LESS)WENT INTO THERE LANE,CUT THEM OFF AND CAUSED A THREE CAR ACCIDENT.PAUL WAS THE ONLY FATALITY.I GO TO BEREAVERMENT GROUPS, I NEED THEM.IT IS AWFUL AND VERY HARD TO GO ON WITH LIFE WITHOUT THEM.PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT THERE CHILDREN.IT IS SUCH AN EMTYNESS.FROM DAY ONE I HAVE SAID IS"WHY GOD,WHY PAUL"MAY GOD BE WITH YOU CAROLYN & MAY HE GIVE YOU PEACE.LOVE GERI,LOSS OF AN ONLY CHILD,MOM.
At 8:20pm on July 23, 2010, Lisa Hobrook said…
Your words touched my broken heart ... I have no words of advice ... just so saddened by your pain and loss. I am so sorry. Lisa
At 7:23pm on July 22, 2010, Marina Angel said…
dear Carolyn I am so sorry for your son leaving so suddenly mijo left suddenly 5-8-08 @ age 21- He was my third son-my Irish son-my first husband was Italian - Know that I do value having 2 other sons and just thought today how hard it is if it is ur only child leaving too soon MY son Joey (mijo is my web name for him) had such a big spirit he has 'come to me' in dreams letting me know he is in a better place and I think he wants me to let others know that 'life goes on -just on a different level -'talk to ur son- (thru God) he will hear u w/lov Marina
At 3:01pm on July 18, 2010, Susan said…
Carolyn, I feel the same sadness. I lost my only child Jeff on October 7, 2008 he was only 21. How are we suppose to go on? A mother should never have to bury their child. I really miss him, each and every day. I hope to find some sort of reason why. I feel your pain. I'm so sorry for your loss.
At 9:20am on July 18, 2010, Phil's Mamama said…
You have said so well how I feel. My sadness only seems to get worse too. My sweet son was 19. . .like yours he meant the world to me.

Please know just how truly sorry I am
Philips Mamma
 
 
 

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