MISSING MOM

missing my mother;
i miss momma so much march 16 2008 at 59 years young she left me i have been so angry at god, being a christain i know he understands this but why couldnt i had more time? we would always talk several times a day, she had lived with me several yrs but i could no longer care for her (bipolar schizo and willie prader sydrome) that was the hardest thing i ever done to entrust my young mothers care to others, because i had to work to care for my own family. mother was never really happy at those group homes she lived in and that quilt fills my very soul with despair. the week before she died was strange and i never heeded or understood the things that happened, her picture was off my wall 3 times that week and moved to other places in the room i ask others if they moved it they said no and everyday that week untill she passed i smeeled this strong smell of flowers and finally told my husband that it was a smell of a funeral home ...unknowing that i think it was a sign god was taking my mom i would visit her all the time and that week i had been sick with the flu and still working and we had talked every day that week her asking when i was coming to visit and i told her i didnt want to give her my flu i missed her that week and would never see her again never get to tell her good bye or kiss her sweet cheek or tell her how much i love her its been eight long months but only yesterday to me, i need my mom.