Monica not to good today. Everything reminds me of dad also. Hard to believe he is gone. My connection to the family is gone forever. My mom was/is always to busy, my brother is busy doing what he does best
whatever makes him happy. Spoke to my father every day no matter what. Always looked forward to seeing his number come up on my cell phone. Do not know what I would do if I had not found this grief message board. Feel so alone most of the time. My father was my world. I've been married for 7 years but my father was always the most important man in my life "guess you can tell daddy little girl" My husband been a big help but he just can not understand how difficult this is for me...... My friends all think I'm ok. They don't see me cry. That is because I'm crying alone. Glad to hear you were able to cry. Not going to tell you to be strong. Monica for some reason I never thought my dad would be the one to go. Thought it would always be me since I'm in the military with three combat deployments. We celebrated when I came home. Your father sound like a very active person staying busy to the end.... Remember the good that is what helps with me... Hope we both have a better day tomorrow.... Take care

Monica, how are you doing today. Starting to feel a little better....... Not crying every day. Thankful for the small things.

Monica, just finished reading your comment today. Wow, this is exactly how I feel. Why do people ask me how I'm doing? Heck, my dad is gone! That is how I'm doing. You are correct unless a person has experienced this type of pain they have no idea at all. Do appreciate the letters, cards, phone calls, food, etc, etc, everyone did for us while we were making my father final plans...Today is saturday afternoon if my father was alive by now we've spoken on the phone at least three times. Talking and everything but basically talking about nothing. Just loved spending time with my father. Christmas was the best for me with my dad. It had been four years since I've been able to be home for the holidays. He had so much fun together. When I left after the New Year told dad I would be back in less than 17 days days we would have the next 30 days together before I go to my next duty assignment in Germany. WE had made all types of plans of what we were going to do, and the things we wanted to get done. "Came back alright but my father died on the 1/15/2010 two days before my planned arrival. Did not get the opportunity to see him again. Did speak to him on the phone on the 14th he sound great, happy, looking forward to my return home. No idea anything bad would happen to him. How could he survive cancer while I was deployed and have a heart attack two days before my arrival back. At first my reaction with God was Bad, REAL Bad, doing better now. Just miss him. Do feel better being able to talk to people about my feeling who have experienced the exact same thing as me..... Thank you, so much to everyone.

Sorry for your loss - I lost my father Dec. 2008

she hadn't said anything all day and my sister Debbie walked into the room and she said Frances? and Debbie said, no mom its Debbie, Frances is in the living room. Mom sat up in the bed and grabbed Debbie in a hug and said, I just love you all so very much, don't worry everything is going to be ok"

those were the last words my mom ever said.

It also seems that your situation was much like mine, one thing after another, just when I thought the news could get no worse it would get worse. It all happened so fast.

I remember we kept taking her blood pressure and it was dropping and dropping and then we were all around her and I watched her take her last breath a part of me kept thinking, C'mon Mom, please breathe but that was just me being selfish because she had lost the ability to talk or even communicate at all the day before.

IT JUST DOESN'T SEEM FAIR AT ALL. I can see that your dad and my mom died not very far apart at all. Me and my sisters and my brother and her husband were with her around the clock while she was in the hospital and once she came home.