Hello my name is Ruth MY brother died from a massive heart attack in March and IM having a very hard time dealing his wife has already ran off with another man and I would love to choke her although I wont she did some bad things to my brother and every time I see her I see my brother lying in a box and I have to walk out of the room to keep from hurting her IM so angry at her I just want to screamI want my brother back athough I know it wont happen I keep praying that he or god would show me a sign that hes okor god would show me someting that would make me know hes okhe with him but I still havent seen it I told my husband that I have never felt this lost or alone even though hes there I just feel that apart of me is lost and I cant find it do I sound like IM going crazy I was in a car accudent this feruary on the weekend after the accident the 14 I stoped by my parents he was there he followed me out to the car and although I was preoccupied with my fear of drivingand I didnt mean to blow him off but he followed me to my moms car and said Im sure glad your ok a I LOve ya I just remember being preoccupied and murmuring love you to Had I known that was the lat time I would ever see him again I would have done things differently I feel lonely.