Sally, Those who have not walked in our shoes truly do not know what we are going through. Life sucks, but it takes a strong person to move forward. There are days I force myself to get out of bed. I hate every day without my husband he was all I had and he is gone. I truly am alone, no children, no parents, all I have are my dogs.
Divorce and death, oh my, the only thing those 2 words have in common is the letter 'd'! Divorce is caused by a disagreement it is a choice more or less. In death there are NO choices. Again a statement made by someone who does not know our pain. Ignorance is bliss for they do not know what they say!
Sally, My husband died on 6/4/11 after a 17 month battle with lung cancer. We had closure but there is no good way to die for a survivor!
I am going through all my firsts. His birthday, our 23 wedding anniversary and all the holidays and there are no children and a very little family. So thanksgiving was spent by myself as will Christmas. Just me and the dogs! I cry all the time and as time passes it just gets harder.
The first few months I spent in a fog. Just waiting for the front door to open and for him to walk in. I'm still waiting!
You will find as time passes there are NO wright or wrong answers, and there is no guide to follow. You will be able to count your friends on one hand minus your thumb and pinky finger. People will say the dumbest things and for the most part have moved on with their lives.
This is a very hard road in which we are traveling down but you need to take hold of yourself, drinking is only going to add to your problems not solve them.
You have come to a good place there are many caring people here who pass no judgements, give advice and send many cyber hugs. Keep coming here even if it to vent. I feel like you, I do not want tomorrow to come because today is so hard but you have to take each day as a new beginning and no matter how we feel, tomorrow will come ... like it or not! This site will help you to get to the next day and the day after.