Hi Sherry! Haven't heard from you since my November email. Please add me as a friend. I hope you are doing well. As for me I'm still struggling through each day but it is getting a tiny bit better. Please let me know how you are doing.
Please add me to your my friends.
Billy's final diagnosis was Oct 6th - gave him 2 wks to 2 months to live. Mon. Nov 2nd was his final day. The Thurs before he drove his truck and went to the bank to pay it off so I would not have to worry with it. Once he came home the obstruction from the large cancer growths cause him to start vomiting constantly then the hicups that would not stop. By Fri Hospic began trying to start pain medication, but that took all day to get the perscriptions. Once the medication began he was sleeping a lot and I think it was Sun evening that he slipped into a comma.
We were lucky Mon morning, Hospice had a clergy that sang Amazing Grace and How Great thou Art and read scriptures and final prayer. We think he heard it because 1/2 hour later he died.
I think his mind stayed ok, he kept handling the bills to the last minute trying to ensure that I would be ok. However, I could tell from his handwriting over the last couple of months that his nervous system was changing.
I just realized today that my daughter will not have her father to give her away at her wedding and my son will not him his father as his best man. Daughter is 31 and son 28. What a thought! There will be many moments that I had taken for granted that would happen in the future. Like - no retirement together and the trip to the Grand Cannon.
Please keep in touch. You are the only one I've had contact with that is familiar with pancriatic Cancer. I would like to give my email, but I don't want it posted on internet.
Please add me as a friend. I am new to this and still figuring out how to get around. I just found your reply by accident. This is my 5th day at work. It has really been a very long week. BTW - Oct 6th was when we were told my husband had 2 wks to 2 months left. He didn't quite make 4 wks.
I understand what you are going through. My husband died Dec. 14, 2008 and I was his caretaker. He was diagnosed with colon cancer on June 10, 2008 and the cancer had already spread to his bladder, liver and his lung. During his 6 months, he had 3 surgeries one of which was to place a port cath for his chemo (that never happened). I saw him pass away and that has been with me ever since - I keep seeing him pass away from me. They say it gets better, but it's been almost a year and it seems like yesterday for me. We were married for 40 years and was 4 days away from our 41st anniversary. I mentioned to him during the last two weeks that our 41 anniversary was coming up and he mentioned that he didn't think he would be here for it (and he wasn't). He knew he was leaving me but didn't say a word. There were many days I didn't know what to say to him other than I love you. I did not mean to unload my grief on you, but I have no one to talk to that's been through this. Thanks for just listening.
Sherry, my husband died at home Nov 2, 2009 after a long struggle with pancriatic cancer. We were married 39 years and he was 60 yrs. old. The first two weeks I cried at everything. This week I've gone back to work and at first it seemed that I started the grieving from day 1 all over again. It is a real struggle to work, but my husband said he did not want me to do anything that may affect my employment. The amount of paper work to be accomplished is really driving me crazy, my dining room table has stack of papers all over it. Can't find some important docs. and too many of others. I keep him in my heart and thoughts and he promised to wait for me at heavens gate. He always accomplished things quickly and I have always been trying to keep up with him... He certainly had his life in order and was ready to go for months, however, I stayed in denial. Now I have to figure out who I am.