Steve Cain
  • 59, Male
  • Aurora, IL
  • United States

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Deb S commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Harold, My thoughts and prayers and hugs are with you today. You are so right. it seems like forever ago and just a minute ago since we lost our beloved spouses. Several times a day I still say (out loud) "Bobby, I miss you SOOOO…"
8 hours ago
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Chuck Thank you for thinking of me and remembering. I usually work through it on my own, as I said to Sara I have a family here and I don't have to work through it on my own. Yes the Love, Support and Comfort I receive from my online family…"
8 hours ago
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Todd Thank you Todd Hugs to you too brother."
9 hours ago
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Sara Thank You, I appreciate that, sometimes I feel so alone in my grief. I just need to come on this site to remember  I have a family here always willing to offer support and comfort. Your right I have often felt like it was forever when…"
9 hours ago
Sara Murphy commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Thinking of you today Harold.  8 months.....seems so long and like just yesterday. "
10 hours ago
Todd B. Goodrich commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Hi Harold, Hugs to you brother! "
12 hours ago
Charles E. Nelson commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Dear Harold, As I just said to Marsha, some days we find ourselves most in need, and today you are in my uppermost thoughts as you go through this day - the sad  8 month anniversary of your loss of your beloved Diane. Here the day is cloudy,…"
18 hours ago
Charles E. Nelson commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"My dear Marsha, Such a moving and beautiful way to start another day - you always find ways of touching us all with your tender support and encouragement when we find ourselves most in need. My friend, to me, and to us all you too are a hero, as…"
18 hours ago
Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"To my beloved extended family ...  This song I dedicate to you because I believe in what it says; we do get stronger, we learn to smile again, we will feel joy and we will raise our faces to the sun knowing our loved ones are there to give us…"
22 hours ago
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Debra I know exactly what you mean, my wife died on January 29th 2016 which is tomorrow. I get depressed and nervous every month around the 29th. I would have a hard time keep going forward without this group, it doesn't help a lot to talk to…"
Deb S commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Harold, Your post spoke to me. This is exactly what I experienced and am feeling now. I was in total shock when my husband died. I often relive the two weeks he was hospitalized and question whether I did everything within my power to prevent…"
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Sheri  I unfortunately agree it gets harder after the first few months. For me When Diane went into Intensive Care, I went into Shock then. I felt the same way then as I did when she died. I was on auto-pilot, felt dead inside, did things by…"
Charles E. Nelson commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Hello Debra, I just read your post, and was so moved by the sincerity and generosity you show in sharing with us your feelings. I often feel that there are people here who speak little, or not at all, but whose experience of grieving in private…"
Gretchen G commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Sheri - I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.  As others have already said, this is a great place to come to and get everything out.  We're all here to help each other through."
Gretchen G commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Hi Debra - I just saw your post and had to re-read the first part a couple times... My husband, Paul, also died on January 13, but in 2015.  So odd that it was the same name, and day, just completely took me by surprise."
Deb S commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Sherri, Please accept my sincere condolences on the recent loss of your husband. Please know that you are not alone in feeling that you are on autopilot. I felt that way for a long, long time. Slowly, at one's own pace, healing begins. The…"

Profile Information

Just a quick note to thank you all for supporting each other. When I started this I would have NEVER thought this group would grow this big and have the amount of activity that it does. It's great to see you all supporting and helping each other. With 3 jobs it is hard to spend as much time as I'd like but it's good to know I don't have to spend a lot of time here administering things. Just remember I'm around if you need me. When something gets posted I do get an email and I will respond as soon as I get that. Thank you all for taking care of each other and remembering your loved ones here.

Comment Wall (104 comments)

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At 11:08am on June 18, 2015, Cynthia Murphy said…

It has been a while since I have been here. My husband died 19 months ago after 17years of suffering from diabetes related problems. I didn't think I would ever get better but I have. Eight months into a horrible grief a friend called and asked me to come over, her brother was there. I dated her brother in high school. He had lost one of his sons in 2001 and grieving as much as I was. We've had so many discussions about what we have been through and where we are now.. We are dating now and loving life again. We still talk about our loved ones we lost but we remember with smiles and happy memories. I don't know what the future holds for me but I have to trust that God is leading me in the direction that was meant to be for the second half of my life.

At 2:19pm on September 1, 2014, Karen W said…

Joyce, welcome to the site.  I'm so sorry for your loss.  I lost my husband Ed almost 9 months ago and I have found myself back at this site often looking for comfort, encouragement, understanding, or just to vent my feelings.  Everyone here has been where you and I are and understands what we are going through.   I wish you strength for each new day. 

At 10:45am on September 1, 2014, Joyce M said…

I too am new to this site...and am not sure how to post a comment...I have read so many comments by others and have found some small measure of comfort knowing that what I am going thru is so normal...I lost my husband just 3 weeks ago and every day is so hard right now....

At 9:44am on May 26, 2013, Jan said…
How do I talk to people on this site? I posted and did a blog and no one responded. Maybe I didn't do it correctly.
At 9:02pm on December 7, 2012, Babs said…
I just realized I posted
I have read others post and it seems no matter whether the loss of our loved one is recent or years ago What I am feeling is what others have posted
I feel a large piece of my heart died when he did I feel like I have to be another person at work and then go home to our home we shared for 45 years and feel so alone I just crawl in bed and zone out to movies or sleep When I think about how much I miss him and being there when he took his last breath it's like I have to put my feelings away because its too hard to deal with them. I get mad then sad and cry I just want to go to sleep and wake up and he is back home with me. The question I have is I feel bad when other family members call with problems they are having or if they are sick. I feel like I can't handle it or be sympathetic and say the wrong thing to them. I really don't want to talk to others I feel bad I can't listen to there problems Does anyone else feel this way. I have always been the strong one helped others and was able to fix my problems. This grieving I can't fix me. I know everyone says it takes time but this is the worst thing to go thru and I don't feel I will ever be me again. I married Mike when I was 18. Moved from my patents house to be Mikes wife then became a mother and now 45 yrs later alone. I was always a wife and a mother never a me I don't know how to be me. Mike and I were friends too and did everything together I really don't have friends Sorry my post is so long. Mikes birthday is coming up then Xmas. Thanks for listening
At 8:40pm on December 7, 2012, Babs said…
Hi. I am new here how do I post a question My husband of 45 years passed away 10 months ago tonight I don't feel it will ever be better I miss so much. GOD BLESS EVERYONE
At 2:35am on September 13, 2012, Marilyn kroge said…
I am facing the 1st anniversary of the loss of my beloved Jim and I still can't accept that I am alone for the first time since I was 18 years old, almost 50 years with the same man and my only love. I wake in the night to sounds that I realize are coming from my very soul. I find myself calling out to him, begging him to please come back to me, that I can't go on without him and I can't stop the tears that won't stop and I don't want to stop the pain I feel because that would make it real, it would mean that I finally know that I will never feel his arms around me, that I'll never kiss him goodbye when he left each morning. This man I met for the first time and we knew that first meeting that love at first sight really happened and we were together from that moment until I kissed him and felt his last breath, warm and so amazing that I felt his breath as he closed his eyes and so quietly left me forever . I know how maudlin my words sound but I so need to finally tell someone of my pain. I'm not allowed to say any of this to my sons or anyone in my family. Their grief became anger and so this has been my life, alone and terribly hurt that no one wants to hear what I've said here where I feel safe sharing my deepest thoughts. Thank you......."m"
At 9:13pm on September 12, 2012, Margie Thrash said…

I am coming up on my second month without my rock (Scott) it is hard but I do have good friends that check up on me every night if I dont contact them so I am fortunate that way.  Had to already go thru his birthday without him was very hard to do.  Then we always did a 100 mile horse ride week of labor day did it this year by myself with a few friends and was hard but I did it.  Not a day goes by I dont cry.  One of his last text to me was please dont get depressed like I am right now (he had 3 months to live from diagnosis made it 3 1/2).  So I try to think of that text everytime it gets too bad and I go outside or work around the house and listen to alot of music.

At 2:21am on January 10, 2012, Rowe said…

Welcome to all new members. I Lost my first husband 31 yrs ago at the age of 38. Remaried 6 yrs later and lost my Late husband after 10 yrs. He has been gone for 15 years. I am living proof that after the grief, Life will go on.  Not at first, but about 5 yrs later you will be living again.. even though you thought it would never happen. I Recommend that you do not try to avoid the grief.. you have to deal with it because if you dont it will be waiting for you to come back. I am here for you if you need to vent, or just want someone to give you an ear.

At 5:40am on December 15, 2011, dawn m long said…

hi steve only a few more days till christmas .. Im here for ya

 luv dawn


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