valerie becker
  • Female
  • moravia,ny
  • United States
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At 5:41pm on May 3, 2010, Lisa Hobrook said…

Just wanted to say hi and check in on you. I am so sorry I didn't notice your earlier comment to me. I sometimes take a break as the pain is so great.

There are no words for the pain of a mom who loses her baby. I will never get over the death of my "treasured beyond belief" son, Chad.

I am so sorry for your loss. Never in my wildest dreams did I see this happening or understand the all comsuming loss that is really forever.

The only thing I can say is words that are now hanging on a sign at my son's school in his honor. The are "Always look up, never give up, always get up". That was the essence of my son.

If you need to talk about your son, I will be glad to listen.

If you want to read more about my son you can go to

Thinking of you and knowing how hard every second of every day is without your boy,

Lisa (Chad's mom)
At 4:38pm on March 15, 2010, Angie said…
How are you doing Valerie? Hoping you are well...I know you have heard ppl say with time it will get better...and believe it, I didn't think that it would but with counseling it has helped...if you haven't received any counseling pls do so, I urge you to seek it. My God Bless Your Soul...Until next time...Angie
At 2:23pm on March 10, 2010, Jill Hammitt said…
Valerie, My heart aches for you and your family. You are on a journey that will take you all thru many things & emotions. I believe it is a life long journey, walking with the loss of a child. I commend you for giving your son CPR. That had to be so unreal. It is amazing how strong we are when we must be! You are obviously very strong. There are so many emotions you are having/will have. I tell everyone to learn about grief because it explains much of what we question about ourselves, family, friends. Mayo is a good source. Then find comfort in the many ways you can: photos, music, memories, his favorite foods, just anything that gives you comfort. Treasure every detail you remember. One of the greatest healing tools for me is to journal or write things down. It is a release of pain and intense grief as I write, cry, even laugh while I put my inner thoughts/feelings to paper. Much of this is in the form of a letter to my son, Michael, who died Oct 13, 2008. When I stop, I always feel better somehow. Please continue to share within this group. In a strange way, it is so helpful. You are not alone and we do know how you feel. We are all helping one another. I will pray for you and your family. God Bless!
Jill H.
At 3:00pm on March 8, 2010, geri said…
Hi Valerie,i'm so sorry on the loss of your son.I lost my son too, on Easter Sunday,March 23,2008.Also in a car accident.Paul was a passenger in his friends car,a senior in college.My only child.My shock and disbelief lasted a very long time,It will be two years soon,and things are pretty much the same.Every day is like walking on egg shells,trying not to lose it.Also I put on a good front,why I don't no,I think because it will help me too,to stay strong.I read all of our sad stories,here on our site,every day.My heart breaks.We all had so much to look forward to with our children,and then so abruptly taken away.Not even to say good-bye.Try and get thru one day at a time,when I looked ahead, when it first happened,I was so scared at the thought of Paul not being here with me,that's when i decided i won't look ahead anymore.One day at a time's challenge is enough to get thru.You our in my thoughts and prayers.Godspeed, Geri, Paul's mother always and forever!
At 10:03am on March 8, 2010, valerie becker said…

his birthday is march 10
At 8:19pm on March 7, 2010, Linda Kohls said…
Numb is a way to feel to get through such a horrible loss. I am so sorry about your son. My son died Jan.16th,2010-he was 37 and had a heart attack. I wish I could help you cope it is the most horrible pain I have ever imagined. I can't even look ahead because I just think of Holiday's and birthdays and anniversary's of his death. I have another son and 2 grandchildren and helps me to hang on. Get through each minute or hour at a time. Devastated- Linda Kohls
At 7:34pm on March 7, 2010, Jenny Ruselowski said…
I am so sorry for your loss. i lost my 17 year old son on dec 19, 2009. i go to group therapy with his little brother and i go to therapy by myself. it does help i also have started to take medication for depression. i was so bad i cryed all day every day for weeks. there are also groups on yahoo which are of a great help to me. i talk to people daily on there. they are such a huge help to me. they understand my pain and i understand theirs. if you can join yahoo groups and search grief support. i will keep you in my thoughts.

((((hugs)))) to you from michigan
Jenny R
you can also look me up on facebook just send me a message and tell me you are from here so i will except you.
At 6:34pm on March 7, 2010, Kathy Mook said…
Hi Valerie, I'm so sorry for the loss of your David. We are all here for you. This is one group that none of us ever wanted to be a part of but a lot of us lean on a lot. You and your family will be in my prayers. I know you are new so you might not know that if you click on our pictures you will usually find our stories. We are here to be here for you and for each other. Hugs of Hope, Kathy
At 2:26pm on March 7, 2010, Tweedie's mom said…
Hi hun, so so sorry for your and your families loss, I too lost my son just 7 months ago, in a car accident.I do understand what your going through,write me anytime that is my personal email.. Prayers for comfort and peace. Tweedies mom
At 1:57pm on March 7, 2010, Angie said…
Hey Valerie, I'm so sorry for your loss of ur son...I know u will hear this a 1,000 have to baby steps and one day at a time...i'm in grief counseling and that is helping in time when ur able to deal with it better, consider counseling. please contact me thru my e-mail address if ur would like to talk further....

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