November 2012 Blog Posts (43)

In lieu of flowers...

As we head into the gift giving season full steam ahead, I’ve been paying particular attention to the “gifts” that are suggested in obituaries – the donations made to honor a person’s memory their favorite charity or their life’s work.

For years I have sent checks to whatever followed the phrase “in lieu of flowers,” but it seems now that, like everything else connected with dying these days (memorial services, do-it-yourself obituaries, funeral attire, parting gifts, etc.),…


Added by Susan Soper on November 30, 2012 at 4:21pm — No Comments

The beginning of the end

My life has just become meaningless. My friends have forsaken me, my girlfriend is with another, and my pent up emotions a have snapped into sadness. I am Shane McDowell, i will post everyday. Well, i hope i am able to, anyway. My life has been good, now its downhill into a pit of pain and agony, then those emotions torture my soul into being a unstable wreck of sadness and fury, but on the outside is a boy, who is pushed around. That boy has snapped. There is no turning back. This is the… Continue

Added by Shane McDowell on November 29, 2012 at 8:22pm — No Comments

We all share the same grief!

At one point or another in our life - we all share the same grief - Death.  Be it someone near and dear or one of our dearest family member - the enemy death comes to all of us.  However, it is not the final say in our life; for our Heavenly Father has procured a way in which he can fulfill his original purpose for mankind. (Psalms 37:9,10)  Free of any sort of suffering or pain. (Revelation 21:3,4)

Almighty God Jehovah promised better condition for all mankind to enjoy peace and…


Added by Diamond on November 29, 2012 at 5:53pm — No Comments

Communication Is Key

When that vessel that holds our divine spark shatters after experiencing loss, everything kind of goes haywire.  Our emotions run rampant, our memory becomes swiss cheese, and often times we don't say what we mean.  The last one isn't intentional, it just happens.  I think it's a combination of the first two that causes our basic communication skills to basically shut down.  In our heads we're thinking one thing; out of our mouths comes something either incomprehensible or sugar coated so we…


Added by Christopher Ruggles on November 29, 2012 at 4:49pm — No Comments

Anthony's Story from Mom

I miss Anthony so much!! He was my only son. I have 3 other daughters and Anthony also has a step sister. All are pretty much grown except one who is 17. So they realize the whole situation of how their brother was killed. Anthony was a brother, an uncle, a loving son and wonderful friend to many. His death was such a tradegy and in my heart I am so angry and mad right now. I have so many feelings its hard to put into words how I feel about the tradegy for one and especially about the…


Added by Bonnie Dempsey on November 28, 2012 at 2:52pm — No Comments

Why Some People Choose Cremation

Q. I don’t understand why anyone would want to be cremated, but it seems like more and more people insist on it, including my own father. Why has it become so popular?  

I’m on your side. The very thought of cremation gives me the shivers. It’s so final—no chance of coming back. (I know. I know.) Others, however, feel differently. Their worst nightmare is…


Added by Florence Isaacs on November 26, 2012 at 10:23am — 1 Comment

Handling the Holidays

The leftovers have been eaten, the out of town family has returned back to their homes, work begins again… another Thanksgiving is done. Yet the holidays are not over. You cannot go anywhere without hearing Christmas music or seeing decorations everywhere you look. What was once a joyous season has become a constant reminder of your loss. You wish you could feel “merry” or “jolly,” but…


Added by Nancy Weil on November 26, 2012 at 10:00am — No Comments

Thanksgiving Letter To Liz

Dear Liz,


The entire morning was taken up by cooking my very first Thanksgiving dinner ever!  There was really no time to mourn or grieve.


I saw the flowers I have for well as the pictures...but I focused on making the dinner, and having a special Thanksgiving with my husband and my kids.


Afterward I took one of the Thanksgiving pictures I made and took it and my Kindle to my room.  I read some on my Kindle...I touched the picture...I…


Added by Christine Bastone on November 22, 2012 at 10:02pm — No Comments

Happy Birthday in Heaven Beautiful Boy

Added by Colleen Pasay on November 22, 2012 at 10:53am — No Comments

Missing our loved ones who have passed away!

My sincere condolences to those who have lost someone in death. 

During certain times of the year (Holidays, Birthdays, anniversaries) it can be extremely hard to cope with the loss of a loved one. My prayer is that you find peace and inner strength to cope during this difficult time.


Rev 21:3,4, "And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes…


Added by Margaret Lopez on November 22, 2012 at 6:34am — No Comments

Thanksgiving 2012, Plans for the Day, and Giving Thanks

This Thanksgiving, Thursday, November 22, 2012 marks the beginning of the second holiday season without Timmy.  As melancholy as it is without my son, I am grateful for the memories and love I have of my son, as I am grateful for my surviving children.  I am grateful for the support I had received from family and friends during the course of the past eighteen months since Tim’s death; without that support I would have fallen into an abyss which may have been a struggle to climb out of and…


Added by Martin Connors on November 22, 2012 at 2:59am — 4 Comments


Hello all,

When I was 17, my sister was murdered. Since then, I've been searching for someone who's sibling has been murdered. I haven't found anyone and I would really like to connect with someone about this. My friends and family shy away from the topic; it makes them uncomfortable to talk about :/

My sisters story.

When she was younger, my sister was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, anxiety, depression, ADHD, and anger problems.…


Added by Sarah Boutilier on November 21, 2012 at 8:21pm — No Comments

Finding joy- just for today.

I have tried it all.  I turned to God first, and I still do, but some days I can't even pray. I've been to a doctor, a psychiatrist, a counselor.  I've been medicated, and not medicated.   Some days I am not happy to be alive - and I feel guilty for feeling this way.  Does everyone?  I think of all the saddest things I can think of - I pile on the grief that I imagine everyone else is going through, over various situations, and tell myself "your grief is not that bad".  Your grand babies are…


Added by Debby Cahrier on November 20, 2012 at 10:36am — No Comments

I miss you.

I hope you are resting well.  I am scared with each passing day, my memory of your smile and laughter become more distant.  I miss you with all my heart, I love you Jaret.

Added by byron leclair on November 20, 2012 at 5:14am — No Comments

The Strange Things To Come

Grief does very strange things to us, both physically and mentally.  Our emotions change in a fraction of a second, often making us feel like we're either going completely mad or we're schizophrenic.  Physically, after the initial loss, we have that sensation of having a large empty space in our chest.

One of the things that are the most difficult to get through, are the physical habits we had.  Specifically, having another person next to us in bed.  That physical act affects…


Added by Christopher Ruggles on November 19, 2012 at 2:07pm — No Comments

16th birthday, spent in heaven.

I love and miss you so much Bubby. I know you were there for the party. It would have been perfect with you there in body. We collected $137 for the SPCA.

Added by Debra {{{Kaylee's mom}}} on November 19, 2012 at 9:13am — No Comments

Grief In The Workplace

At the Center for Grief Recovery, we often find that our services are needed in response to a sudden loss in the workplace. The following outline has been used to help groups cope with such situations. The ideas in it, however, are applicable to many different kinds of loss experiences.


The first step in dealing with a death in an institution or workplace is to stop the normal activities and reschedule so that employees can come together to share their thoughts…


Added by David Fireman on November 18, 2012 at 8:51pm — No Comments

Day-Cation, Kryptos, and the Spy Museum

By the summer of 2002, Timmy had developed an interest in spies and spying equipment, in part due to the Spy Kids movie directed by Robert Rodriguez that came out in the spring of 2001 and DVD and VHS by September 2001.  Timmy was fascinated by the idea that kids were the heroes who were tasked with saving their parents whom were spies and from a long family line of spies on each side of the family.  Other media bolstered his fascination – Max Steel, Johnny Quest, the Power Rangers – shows…


Added by Martin Connors on November 17, 2012 at 4:16am — No Comments

Looking Back and Moving Forward

There are things I don’t think about anymore. Like my sister Denise's birthday or the anniversary of her death. I am always aware of them but I try not to put too much focus on them, especially the day she died. I prefer to use my sister's birthday as a time to remember her as a person and reflect on what she continues to mean in my life.

But Denise’s 20th…


Added by Michelle Rusk (Linn-Gust) on November 16, 2012 at 3:00pm — 1 Comment

I Am Thankful

With Thanksgiving just around the corner, I wanted to share a poem written by Darcie Sims. If you are grieving this holiday season, this poem is for you.

For That, I Am Thankful

By Darcie Sims

It doesn’t seem to get any better, but it doesn’t get any worse either. 

For that, I am thankful.

There are no more pictures to be…


Added by Nancy Weil on November 16, 2012 at 12:59pm — No Comments

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