Added by Florence Isaacs on September 16, 2015 at 10:30am — No Comments
Q. In the last year or so, a divorced acquaintance told me, "Divorce is just as devastating as the death of your husband." Another said, "Divorce is worse." The remarks came from out of the blue. I felt…Continue
Wikimedia Commons | LJP assistant
Q. My sister and I have had a rocky relationship for much of our lives, yet we seem to be drawing closer now that my husband has died. Is this unusual?
According to family therapist Karen…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on August 14, 2015 at 1:30pm — No Comments
(Flickr Creative Commons | Reviving Memories)
Q. In my bedroom I display an 8x10 photo of my late husband at his best. Smaller photos that include him (shots of happy family events and our many trips) are scattered…Continue
Q. I am happily remarried after six years as a widow. My first husband is buried in a family plot I purchased when he died. My own plot is right next to his. The graves of my parents and other relatives are in the same cemetery. However, my second husband talks about me being buried with him in another state, close to his children.…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on April 6, 2015 at 10:00am — No Comments
Both research and demographics confirm your observations. In a 1996 Annals of Clinical Psychiatry study of…Continue
Valentine's Day without your spouse can be hard, especially for the first time. It's one of those…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on February 9, 2015 at 10:30am — No Comments
Q. My husband died a few months ago, and I've got a pile of sympathy cards and notes to respond to, not to mention messages posted on the funeral home website and elsewhere online. He knew a lot of people. Do I have to write to everyone, and how much time do I have to do it? I feel overwhelmed.
Responding to expressions of sympathy has always been a monumental task for widows. It's hard enough to put one foot in…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on January 15, 2015 at 11:30am — No Comments
Q. A friend of mine, a widow like myself, volunteers at a soup kitchen every year at holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas. I’m thinking of joining her, but I’ve never volunteered before. What do you think?
A Chinese proverb advises, “If you want happiness for a lifetime, help someone else.” I’ve found that to be true and I know many other widows who have added meaning to their lives through volunteer work at…Continue
Flickr Creative Commons | Ares Nguyen
Q. Why don’t people remember the anniversary of my husband’s death? Even my husband’s sister and brother don’t seem to be aware of it or mark it in any way. It bothers me that he’s forgotten.…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on November 19, 2014 at 2:30pm — No Comments
Q: I find that my relationships with some couple friends have changed dramatically since I’ve been widowed. In some cases, I’ve been dropped entirely from their social calendar; in others the wife is available for lunch or dinner only during the week and only alone. Is there anything I can do about…Continue
Q. I’m in my 50s and thinking of taking a vacation by myself so I can meet some new people. But I’m also frightened. I’ve never traveled completely alone before, although my late husband and I saw much of the world together. Do you have any suggestions?
I think you’re brave. Many widows share your anxiety. Yet…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on September 10, 2014 at 12:30pm — No Comments
Q. I’d like to run an in memoriam for my late husband in the newspaper obituary section. Is there any time limit? (My husband died four years ago.) What should I say, and when is the best time to do it?
There’s no expiration date for loving and…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on August 19, 2014 at 10:00am — No Comments
Q. My husband has been desperately ill for a long time, and I’ve been told it’s only a matter of weeks now. Close friends who live far away have asked whether I prefer they fly in for the funeral – or visit me afterward. They can’t do both,…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on July 2, 2014 at 7:00am — No Comments
Having to do everything yourself, including the…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on June 13, 2014 at 2:00pm — No Comments
Q. I’m thinking of leaving some money in my will to the college I attended. When my husband was alive, we gave more to his alma mater than mine, and I want to make up for it. Should I let the school know about my plan? Or is it enough to just mention the bequest in my will?…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on May 5, 2014 at 1:30pm — No Comments
Q. I’ve tried online dating on a variety of websites, but have never been interested in continuing to see someone after a first meeting for coffee or lunch. There hasn’t been any chemistry. Any advice? I had a very good marriage and my friends say my standards are too high. But I’m not willing to just “settle.”…Continue
First, select a dating website that feels congenial. This isn’t as easy as it…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on March 10, 2014 at 9:30am — No Comments
Q. My friend’s husband died several months ago, and she’s having a very hard time. She’s on the verge of becoming a recluse and won’t consider a bereavement group or counseling. How can I help her? I’m a widow myself, but I’ve tried everything I can think of.
Not everyone is open to joining a bereavement group…Continue
Added by Florence Isaacs on January 23, 2014 at 1:00pm — No Comments
Q. My husband was very sick for years before he died. Although I loved him dearly, I’m now ready for a new relationship. But I’m not willing to be a nurse again. I recently met someone and want to know about the state of his health before I get too involved. I need your advice on…Continue