27 years of truditions went down the drain. I couldn't face Christmas at all this year. Nothing seems to be coming together. It is hard to put on a happy face when you feel so bad that you want th hit someone so they feel as bad as I do. I thought this is to get easier and it don't everyday my heart breaks more and more. Phone rings I pray it is him and I am having a bad dream. I don't know what to do. I feel so many emotions I can't deal with them. I just don't know where to start to pick up the pieces.

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