Within less than two days time, I learned of three (3) deaths:

(1) My ex-husband - 49 years old. Died August of last year. (Married 13 years, no children, divorced since 1995, spoke with only a couple of times since then over the phone)
(2) My very good friend - 46 years old. Died Jan of last year. (A widow with 2 young sons in their late teens, early twenties, spoke with often over the years, but not in the most recent past two or three years)
(3) Someone I don't know and have never met, who was murdered in cold blood by an old friend of mine who I called to tell about the first two (he knew both my ex-husband, and my girlfriend). The senseless act of murder committed by this person occurred in Jan of this new year.

I am at a complete loss on trying to understand why my ex-husband's Mother and/or sister made no attempt to contact me to inform me of my ex-husband's death. But they also did not inform any of my ex's friends either. We are all in the dark. He lived most all of his adult life in one town. And his Mother (I confidently presume) buried him in his high school town 5 states away, with private services, no calling hours. Not even an obit in the local paper where he lived. Only an obit in her hometown. I have only learned that he died in the hospital, and had some sort of unusual health issues which required him to have a respirator placed in his throat. And he was in the hospital for a couple of weeks. His family didn't even notify the friends who came to visit him in the hospital!! I have tried to locate an address, and/or phone number for both his mother and sister but have not met with any success. I really feel the need to know what happened to him.

My girlfriend's death was under sad circumstances. Drugs. And I'm certain her family had no idea how to get in touch with me. At least she had a lovely service that was well attended!! I've spoke with her Mother, and feel much better having done so, and asked her to please pass my sympathies to her children, brothers, and loved ones.

The old friend - well - I am in shock. Complete utter shock. His family told me of the horrific act he committed!!!!

Someone may think "What kind of friends do I keep or make?" Perfectly understandable for anyone to raise eyebrows on this topic. But the truth of the matter is I have very respectable friends, am a very respectable person, fairly religious, and an average law abiding citizen.

All this news of death, death, murder and death is blowing my socks off!! I think the knowldege of the murder/death is simply overwhelming me. I feel like scrubbing my brain to erase the knowledge. I have asked myself far too many times the same question repeatedly. "How could I know someone who handedly took another person's last breath from their body?" The old friend bludgeoned a man to death by baseball bat!! I am literally sick to my stomach, and am not sleeping well. I'm afraid if I go to sleep before I'm 100% exhausted that I might have nightmares about all of this.

I do plan on seeking professional grief counseling this week. But meanwhile, I am in a world of hurt.

Any kind words, or comments in general, or feedback would be highly appreciated!!

Hard to believe this is true, but it is!!

Mourning Miller

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