Today it is 19 weeks. For last 19 weeks I have been having weekly anniversary. I want this pain to get better. I don't want to hurt whenever I think of how my husband went. His hopes and dreams for his children that will realize but he wouldn't be able to see them. He would never see his kids getting married or play with his grandkids one day. I hurt because he had made promises to stay with me during good and bad times of my life. This is the worst time and I have to suffer alone. My friends or family don't even know what I am going through. I just somehow want to tell my husband that I miss him every single moment. I miss his presence whenever I am doing something in the kitchen or cleaning one of the rooms. He used to always keep on calling my name whenever I would be doing something in the house and he couldn't see me. Now like he doesn't care anymore. Flame in front of his picture is still burning as I can't turn it off. I still can't move his clothes from behind the door or remove his towel. Why did you take him God? Why?