Grief is the natural, healthy, spontaneous, unlearned, normal, emotional, healing process that occurs after a significant loss.
Grief is experienced uniquely by each of us, and is often experienced in waves, with emotions, thinking, physical, social and spiritual/religious responses coming and going in terms of the intensity, duration and order of our reactions to the loss.
One of the keys to coping is awareness. Awareness is helped if you can learn about yourself. This holistic grief scale is for you to help yourself gain knowledge of your grief, and then to do something with that new awareness.
There are 5 sections in the grief scale. Each section represents a part of being human. They include: emotional, cognitive, physical, social, and spiritual/religious.
To be able to understand the waves of grief we have ranked each experience from 1 to 10: 1 being the low end of the scale and 10 the most intense. For example, if you have been experiencing helplessness since the death, and it is causing you to feel increasingly incompetent, frozen, or unable to exert your personal power in the world, then you would rate yourself near a 10 on helplessness.
After you have completed the scale you will have a picture of your grief at this moment in time. It is a good idea for you to periodically return to the scale and rate yourself again. You will then have a chart of your progress.
Remember that the grief scale can also capture your current experience not only after a death, but after some significant change or transition in your life, such as the loss of a job, divorce, move to another country, etc.
If you score in the severe range of the scale on most or all of the dimensions, we recommend you seek professional help.
Grief Scale
Emotional Components
1. Shock, numbness, feelings of unreality
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
2. Helplessness
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
3. Fearfulness
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
4. Vulnerability
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
5. Sadness
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
6. Anger, irritability
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
7. Emptiness, loneliness
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
8. Guilt
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
9. Carelessness, harming oneself in any way
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
10. Outbursts, euphoria
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
Cognitive Components
1. Slowed and/or disorganized thinking
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
2. Confusion, aimlessness, difficulty concentrating
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
3. Preoccupation, rumination
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
4. Unaffected, no thoughts at all about the person or circumstances
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
5. Dreams, nightmares
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
6. Decreased self-esteem
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
7. Altered perceptions, sensing the presence of the deceased person
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
Physical Components
1. Fatigue, sleep disturbance
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
2. Decreased or increased appetite
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
3. Physical distress, nausea
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
4. Anxiety, hypo-or hyperactivity
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
5. Greater susceptibility to illness
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
Social Components
1. Being unaware of others' needs
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
2. Passive
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
3. Withdrawn or avoiding others
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
4. Decreased work productivity
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
5. Loss of interest in usual pleasures, including hobbies, relationships and/or sex
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
6. Strained relationships, differences in grieving needs between self and others
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
Spiritual/Religious Components
1. Anger at God
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
2. Crisis of faith
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
3. No longer receive comfort and/or strength from your relationship with God
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
4. Loss of meaning in life
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
None Moderate Severe
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