Comment
Francine...I am so sorry that you too have had to come to this place...My son Nickolas died from an accidental overdose of Methadone 5 years ago, he was 17, beautiful..gifted, strong willed...invincible. Young and restless...like all teenagers. He was at a "friends" house and decided to try the other teens moms prescription Methadone, Nick died the other teen lived. The mom swears the prescription was locked up....but there was no evidence of tampering with the supposed "locked" cabinet. You are so fresh and raw in your loss of your precious daughter...i can tell you it gets better...but it takes a LOOOOOONNNNG time. You must be patient with yourself,...your grief will take as long as you need it to be. No one else can give you a true timeline on grief...it will be as unique as you are and as your relationship was/is to your dear child. I still cry...even wail at times... has it lessened "yes" does it still hurt everyday..."yes"...will it ever end......not there yet. But I do know that cuddling up to the Lord Jesus has brought me much comfort and healing,...and the faith to know that I will see Nickolas again when the Lord God calls my name. When Nickolas first died...I no longer wanted to live...I kept walking but i had no desire to continue on in the "inexplicable heartache" of thoes first months. I was in a total place of sur-realness, walking through a fog bank that had no lighthouse...or not one that i thought could ever lead me to a safe shore. I was underwater most of the time...just trying to take the next breath. I finally told the Lord that if i didn't fell somewhat better by the first anniversary date that I was simply going to find a way to lay down next to Nickolas and join him wherever he was....you know what, i felt better on Nick's anniversary date. I have gone on...at times it is one step forward and three steps back....somedays it feels like the first day...somedays like it was forever ago. I saved everything in Nicks room for 3 years, just the way it was...okay so i did clean it , and made it a shrine. Thats okay...even the gum wrappers and a half full mountain dew..:) Now i am here...5 years later to tell you,...it does get better. Now thoughts of my dear son are mingled with tears, smiles and fond memories of his tenacious personality and endless energy. Was he something special....yes...he was/is my son.....he wasn't a saint....he was 17...he was a real boy..:) I will be thinking on you,and praying. Sharon....Nick's mom
First I am sorry for the recent loss of your daughter. In reading your post above, it certainly touched home with me. We lost our son (39) to pain meds/depression meds and then this terrible methadone mixture. All these slow the heart beat. Along with the meds our son had a mild flu and untreated sleep aphnea, which turned out to be a deadly mix. The pain meds he had been on and off 4 10 years because of a broken neck in a swimming accident. He had to continue working (construction) as he had a family of 5 to support. But then a divorce came and the depression meds came. It just seems like there is no control of these very dangerous drugs written out. So sad that so many of us have lost our children to these dangerous habit forming drugs.
My heart goes out to you as you are in the early stages of this continuing grief journey. You have found the right place to be here. Even if you don't post, just reading what other families post can give you some comfort and good advice on having to cope.
My thoughts are with you today.....so sorry for your loss
Susan Donny's Mom
Oh God I feel your pain!!! and I fear for my youngest son. My son died 11 month's ago, Joshua from tc cancer, If I had known I could have had him checked. my youngest is 20 and using oxy to cope!! he is in rehap now. I am so angry at the practice of the doctors to hand out drugs. I am outraged. Feelingyour anger and pain
Laurie
Please be respectful of others. For more information, read our Community Guidelines.
© 2021 Created by Legacy.com.
Powered by
You need to be a member of LegacyConnect to add comments!
Join LegacyConnect