Today would have been my Mom's 81st birthday. It is also the day I wrote and finished her obituary. Its been two weeks since she passed away and I couldn't bring myself to write and finish an obituary for her. I could not write a word for over 8 days...it just hurt too much. But for some reason I woke up this morning at 4am and finished her obituary. How strange and sad that her birthday was the day I wrote it. I don't know what made me do it this morning...perhaps she told me to get it behind me...I don't know. After I finished it, I realized what I had done on her special day. What a sad day I'll remember forever. Mom's Birthday and Obituary finished all in one day. It still seems surreal she is gone and I miss her so much its unbelievable. We were so close and I am having the hardest time accepting she is gone...forever! I am trying to concentrate on all the good times we shared. A lifetime of memories! How do you accept you only have memories now? I want to hear her voice, I want to share so many things with her, I want to do all the things we said we were going to do together such as scrapbooking, I want to hear her laugh, I want to hear her say how much she loves all of us, I want to talk to her on the phone everynight. I need you in my life Mom. I wasn't ready for this no matter what her age was. I know she had a long life as friends have said but I miss her so very much. Everyday seems to hurt like the first 5 minutes she left. Happy Birthday Mom... forgive me for writing your obituary on your birthday. I love you.

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