Hello, I am a gay male widow who lost my husband of 18 years this past march to Duodental perforated ulcer situations. I loved him so very much,and he loved me. I feel guilty everyday about things I said,and things I didn't do,but people tell me i need to stop punishing myself. Life is hard when your love is taken away. I was 51,and he was 72 when he died. I feel guilty because i didn't take him certain places,and at times i yelled at him. There have been people that tell me that being a caregiver can be stressful as he was also disabled from an acute stroke.