Every mother wants to be the best kind of mother for her children. Almost anyone who is a mother desires nothing but the best kind of life for her children and family. However, in the world today, it isn’t a new sight to see mothers having to desire these good things alone. Oftentimes, you will find mothers raising their children alone, struggling to balance from one to three jobs, to spending enough time with the children. And one of the reasons for such situations is the death of a spouse.

          For a lot of women who are in such a situation, it is easy to lose yourself in such difficult times. The death of a spouse or husband isn’t an easy thing and it places a ton of responsibility upon the woman’s hand. She now has to take the reigns and raise her family alone, work doubly hard to support them, and keep everything together.

          According to Carl Mathis’ book Life is What You Make It, turning things around for the better (and for yourself) after the death of your husband isn’t easy but it can be done – with the right outlook. What the book really teaches is acceptance and understanding of the situation you are in right now, then working through that to get to the other side. The death of a husband makes you busier and more burdened, which is something you did not expect. Here are a few ideas to help get you lifted:

  1. 1.     Accept the grief for the time that it is there. Acknowledge that you will be grieving for the loss of your husband, but know that you do not have to be in this rut forever. Think positively and know that time will pass; eventually you will be able to move on from tragedy. 
  2. 2.     Understand the power of your role. Motherhood is the biggest responsibility that any woman can ever take on. Frustration will set in deeper if you do not begin to accept that you will face tough times, especially if you do not have a husband on your side.
  3. 3.     Reevaluate. The death of a spouse puts things in a whole new perspective for the one that was left behind. Priorities change, responsibilities deepen, and motivation strengthens. Now that you will be taking over, reevaluate and see what changes you might have to put in place.
  4. 4.     Believe that you can make a difference. Do not stay stuck in the idea that whatever hard place you are in right now is the way things will be forever. With your efforts and acceptance, you will find a happier, more fulfilled place in life, which is something your spouse would have wanted for you as well.

Being a newly busy mom requires a lot of strength and positive thinking to get you through this phase smoothly. Always see the flipside to things and that way, you’ll be able to find solutions and take action faster and more wisely.

          Written by Carl Mathis, author of Life is What you Make it – Seven Steps to Moving Forward. Visit Carl’s website at http://www.carlmathis.com



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