Hello everyone, I'm new at this. I've been trying to find a support group and it seems the next group I can attend is not until July 2nd. My husband who was also my best friend, travel partner, confidant, laugh and hang out buddy passed June 7th and it is very hard to deal with this. It doesn't feel real. I'm trying to reach out and find support and hear other's stories because I do realize not wanting to live anymore is not healthy. It is so uncharacteristic of me. I'm a life loving person just like he was and it feels so hard to go on without him. I have lots of love and support around me but no one can relate to how I'm feeling. I'm going through the motions and trying to make myself enjoy company and doing things without him but it really really hurts. It's hard to smile and be me anymore.