How to live after breaking up with your loved one? Difficult, sad, lonely. You as if something is missing. First of all - air. Tears overwhelm, heart smiles, emotions are bred. But you need to live on. Sometimes it is very difficult, but it is necessary.
Each of us faced parting with our loved ones. I decided to write a small descriptive essay and devote it to this painful topic for everyone - parting. My goal is not only to describe the states through which a person passes, while parting with loved ones, but also the desire to convince those who are in this state now, to live on ...
Every person is an individual. Therefore, the states described below are given in general. Perhaps you have passed some faster, while others may take significantly longer than expected.
It may even seem like a dream. You may think that you are dreaming all this. You are about to open your eyes, and everything seems like a bad dream.
You thought your lover loved you and could not leave. Despite quarrels and misunderstandings, perhaps treason, you are ready to forget and forgive everything. You want to return the time when you were together, and it seems to you that your beloved person will understand that he is wrong and will return to you soon.
At such moments, you tend to forget about the bad and see everything through rose-colored glasses. It even seems to you that everything can be fixed, and everything will be fine again. Be waiting for his call, look for him in the social. network. You will be hard to call him a former.
You start asking questions and looking for the reason for parting with your loved one. What's wrong with me? Why did he do it? How can I fix this? You will have a strong desire to understand what went wrong and why? This is a very painful stage, because people start asking themselves questions that lead to unpleasant answers or have no answers at all.
Do not blame yourself. Yes, let it seem strange, but do not blame yourself. What is your fault that man does not love you? Forcibly cute will not. Try to think differently. That's what happened. So it should be, it's just not my man ...
You used to constantly talk with your loved one on the phone. And so, he walked, and the phone stopped. And no matter how much you hold it in your hands, your phone will not ring. You understand that you will no longer hear a voice that is so wide and desirable. And then fear comes.
You start thinking that you will always be alone. You begin to fear that no one will love you, that you are doomed to loneliness. You will want to hide under a blanket, feeling lonely, helpless, depressed. You will begin to feel sorry for yourself. You do not want to talk to anyone, or vice versa, your friends will hear from you only about him. You can sit, cry, listen to your song, view common photos. You repeat to yourself that you will never find a person who will love you just as he loved. Do you doubt whether you are good enough for someone to love you?
At this stage, there is a bit of everything, and shock, and denial, and fear and loneliness, and sadness. Everything is going in one bouquet. And you will want to do everything possible so that this person will return to your life. You will have a desire to call him, contact him, and ask to go back to be together. And you can call or write a letter. Although, as a warrant, you can write a letter but not send it. Or pick up the phone but never dial the person you still loved. If you do decide and talk to him, you will promise that you will change, and that this time everything will be different. You will be reminded of how good it used to be. But it will not be the same as before. Everything has changed. You've changed. The problem is that you want to make him come back, make you love you again. And to make someone do what he does not want is impossible. Your relationship is over. But you can't admit it to yourself. You have 2 options: either you will return to the feeling of loneliness, or you will begin to experience a new feeling - anger.
And after you were sad, suffering, trying to get it back, you start to think differently. You have anger in your soul.
You begin to understand how much has been done for this person. What many sacrificed. Now you are thinking: - “I don’t understand why he left me, because I was the best. No one else will love him so much, no one else will do so much good for him like me. He cannot be happy without me . " This moment when you are already tired of blaming yourself, and you need to blame the other. You want to break his pictures into small pieces. Add it to the blacklist and delete the number. Forget, wipe from your memory forever.
This stage is emotionally very difficult. But your anger directed at the former makes you feel alive again. He will help you get out of decline. For many, anger is the first step to healing.
Maybe now it seems to you that you will never accept and accept this situation, but sooner or later this will happen. One day you will realize that despite the heartache, tears, anger and fear, and all that you have experienced - you are still alive. You are able to feel, you are ready to love further.
Reflections on the former will not cause you any more negative feelings. You will feel much stronger than before. Instead of looking back, you begin to plan for the future. You will begin to feel the taste of life and will return to it. You will come to realize that you do not need your ex to be happy, because only you yourself can make yourself happy. You will understand that you are ready to love and you deserve to be loved. Considering this is his personal victory, and this is something to be proud of.
Indeed, sooner or later it will happen. As soon as you feel that you can let go of the last bitterness, it will happen. For some, this step may be difficult. Anger despite being poisonous, feels like the last connection with your ex. And, it will take a lot of time to remove this last link. But it will give you new strength to restore yourself and move on.
This can take quite a lot of time, because simply accepting the separation and agreeing with what happened is different from what you actually forgive your ex. Take your time, everything has its time. But, at that very moment you will understand that everything you do is right. It's really time to move on.