Joe died suddenly last October. My grief was almost unbearable. We had been working hard together planning our future. I had over time moved almost all but furnishings into his house. We were house shopping. Between us we each had 2 boys, all grown. Joe's oldest son had married 2 weeks before he died. The reception was the following weekend. I got the phone call nobody ever wants and my nightmare began. I have struggled over loosing my life partner. My best friend. Dreams we shared will never be realized. Literally over in the blink of an eye. I have since questioned the relationship between father and son. Joe would occasionally remark that his oldest thought he was so smart. Had all figured out. The cockiness of a young man with little life experience. His father had saved him from a life headed in the wrong direction. My double heartache is a result of the way I have been treated by his son. I do realize that we were not yet married and I was not the executor of Joe's wishes. I spent the day preparing for Joe to come home from work. I made pumkin bread which Joe was looking forward to and washed sheets. Deciding what to do for dinner and wondering why I had not heard from him yet. Figured that something was wrong with his phone. It was absolutely not like him to not keep in touch through the day. This was the first time that had happened. I was always so excited for him to get home. I hated being apart as did Joe. Not in a million years would I had ever guessed that Joe would be gone from this earth. Words cannot decribe the feeling of my life being sucked out of me. I was in shock. Joe was not coming home. I was absolutely unconsolable. Several friends came over that day as soon as they heard to share in the loss of a wonderful man and lend support. God Bless them. I did not stay at the house the day of his death. His son and new bride were obviously staying. I was invited to go home with my son. I was numb, too numb to realize I had just been kicked to the curb. I was not givin the chance for any type of closer. Joe died while working out of town and his son had his body cremated immediately. I was not granted the courtesy to see the death certificate so to this day I don't know exactly how Joe died. The only time this young man of his got in touch with me is when he needed information. I made every attempt to reach out to the boy's to share in the grief as I thought I had a good relationship with them. I went to the house and discovered that most of my things were already packed and the locks had been changed. I could barely move physically and still in a state of shock and they were already moving in! I was treated with indifference and incredible disrespect. I took what had been packed up and got what I could of my belongings assuming I would have the opportunity to retrieve the rest. I had plenty of things still there. The kids didn't know what all belonged to me. They did not have a clue what Joe and I had going on in that house. Joe said this is our house. My home is your home. I never gave a thought to the fact that I would ever have been put in a position of Dad's gone Your OUT. They were Obviously worried that I would take more then what was mine. Joe knew what kind of woman he had in me. That is all that really matters but it still hurt. When I made contact with his son I was told that my things were insignificant. I had a house full of food too! These kids apparently felt entitled to it all. Joe and I shared a cell phone plan. His name as the account holder. I was not granted the chance to remove personal information between the two of us from his phone. The boy would not let me have the phone. SO wrong. I left town. I felt suicidal. All of the boys knew how in love Joe and I were and our plan to marry after the first of the year. I honestly thought they were all happy for us. I have a supportive family. My oldest son Joe and wife and grandbabies literally saved my life. I could cry right now over that. I was asolutely completely devestated. I lost my lover. My most intimate partner. Joe and I had great friends and not one person can comprehend the treatment I was subject to. Joe was disrespected as well. It hurts me for him. It seems death brings out the true colors of some. Youth and greed. I have had no contact with them but I find myself being overwhelmed with pain. It takes money to replace property that should have been returned to me. A marriage certificate would have changed the outcome. As a side note, Joe's close friends and coworkers were also closed out. A coworker got a group of friends together to shared memories at the bar Joe used to frequent. Short notice but friends were desperate to connect with each other and share their grief. I know that is not what Joe would have ever imagined his ending to be. Money being a non issue Joe was worth a celebration of a life well lived, a good provider and father who had a beatiful spirit and many friends. I do see Joe's boy driving around town in his fathers nice Dodge pickup and my heart sinks. Joe and I had many good times in that truck. The last time I talked to Joe I was walking out of the grocery store and he was working. We said I love you to each other as we always did and I feel grateful for that. I'll always feel emptyness but I have beatiful memories and that will always be mine.

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