Since my son Rickey died in 04 when we  go to the cemetary we refer to it as Rickey's Park.  All my grandchildren go there knowing Rickey is there.  Recently I haven't been going at all.  Actually since we buried my brother in law Randy, just a few yards from Rickey I feel like it's not Rickey's Park anymore.  No one asked me how I felt about my brother in law being buried in the same cemetary.  That descision was left to my husband, Randy's children who live in Texas and Missouri didn't have a say in where to bury their dad.  I feel my husband bullied the children into it out of guilt.  Randy was the last one to see my son alive and all the stories he has told all differ, so I don't know what the truth is about how my son died.  He was found in 4 inches of water after a night at the lake with his uncle Randy, who was to drunk to really know what happened.   Am I wrong in feeling bitter and not going to see my Rickey on a regular basis like I used to?  I feel like I am pushed out of visiting my sons final resting place by my husband and brother in law.  I drive by the cemetary every day and I can see  all the tigger (his favorite) decorations I have put out for Rickey so its like I see him, but the guilt is still there.  What should I do?

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