How many of us have heard this on one way,  shape, or form?  Or had some well meaning person tell us HOW we should grieve?  I've been through many deaths of people close to me- my parents, grandparents, brother, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, miscarriages and now the one I don't think,  no the one I KNOW I will never "get over", my first born and only son.

After wondering how anyone could possibly expect any parent, especially a mother to get over losing a child I could come to only one conclusion- it makes THEM feel more comfortable.  People in general don't know what to say to anyone who has just lost a loved one.  It's always a diffiicult and awkward moment for most.  People don't deal well in our society with sad or negative feelings period.  How often do we hear "I don't want any drama in my life."?  I hate to disappoint them but that "drama" IS life!  That's probably the problem though.  Our society is so busy busy busy, go , go go and being trained that idependence is best and being dependent on others is a weakness.

The irony is we were created for precisely that- dependence and companionship,  As a Christian God created man so that HE would not be alone and He created woman because He decided it was not good for man to be alone.  Over and over we are told the most important thing is to love one another.  We are told to rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn. So I find it difficult to understand where anyone would come to the conclusion that dependence is a weakness?

It's my belief that grief as well as long term illness has instead become and inconvenience and this is the reason some people push us to move on.  Please know that there are many who do understand and let those who find it too uncomfortable or inconvenient move on themselves.  The ;last thing you need in a time like this is to be bullied.

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