Life will never be the same without my oldest son in it.

My son died on Dec 22, 2011. He was 23 1/2 years old.  The war on Drugs is the victor of this battle.  I know Heiron is the cause of death on the certificate.  I am in the stage of grief where I am asking what could I have done differently.  I know that even if I figure something out, he is gone forever.  It hurts so much.  For the last four years Scott was in and out of jail and rehabs. He was released on Dec. 19, 2011.  He lied and said he wouldn't be released until Dec 21. He called me on 12/21/11, said the probation officer didn't file the correct papers and he wouldn't be out until Thursday 12/22.  I waited to hear from him on Thursday.  He was going to stay with my parents and then come home with me after Christmas.  He was going to move to our new farm and start fresh.  At 11:00 PM the Jackson Sherif came to my house to inform me of the death of my son.  Life will never be the same. 

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