My Journal Is My Friend - Always Near to “Hear” My Grief

The pain is unbearable! I put down the feelings that engulf me. They come tumbling out, faster than I can write. Some words are blotted out where tears have fallen. I write the date and time of day before each entry, giving reality to what is happening. Sometimes I write a lot, other times only a sentence or two. Always I feel some measure of relief.

Why I Write in a Journal


My journal offers a ready release. It is always with me, going in my purse when I leave the house. My friends are not that available.

Having to write slows me down to a pace I can handle. It gets me off the treadmill of going nowhere.

My feelings get all jumbled. Writing helps me to separate them and to make sense of what is happening in my life.

Putting my problems on paper organizes them, and I can begin to write possible solutions. I can refer back and check my progress.

When I need to release pent-up feelings, I can read what I wrote in the early days. That will trigger the tears that need to flow.

Questions without answers can be written down and left on the paper. It stops them from going ‘round and ‘round in my head.

As my grief is released, I begin to note some breaks in the clouds. That feels so good.

A running chronicle gives me a “then” and “now” to measure my growth.

My journal is proof of my survival.

This journal method of expressing my grief has helped me more than anything else. I will continue to share with my journal, a friend who is always near.

You too can begin a journal. Purchase a spiral notebook and continue writing through your grief and beyond.

Do you keep a journal? How do you cope with your grief? Share your story and ideas below.



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Comment by Jerry on June 13, 2011 at 9:17pm
  I have never kept a journal, but a few months ago,about a year after my wife passed on,for some reason I started writing a journal describing the last 6 months of my wifes illness. I ended it in the last month before she died,I will someday get to the last few days,but it will be painful I am sure.
Comment by Marsha H on June 12, 2011 at 7:00pm
I have luckily always had a flair for writing so I have kept journals throughout years past.  Now that my dear husband Ernie has passed I write my feeling in a journal no matter how painful it may be.  Then I decided to write a letter to my husband telling him how much I loved him and I went through two pens and a lot of paper.  I was amazed when I wrote that letter to him how much better I felt inside, but it still does not erase the loneliness and I know only time can help with that and discussing feelings with others who have lost a loved one.
Comment by Diane Cayer on April 26, 2011 at 11:42pm
My daughter's name was Shelly. She was a wonderful daughter, the oldest of seven. Shelly was a mother also, to a 3 yr old little boy named Jaden. You see, when Shelly was married, she was severely abused by her husband. He went to jail for this, but not for long enough. Two weeks before Shelly's death, her ex-husband (by this time) was released. He haunted her every night for 2 weeks, until her death on Nov. 4, 2005, the day he killed her. What he doesn't know is that he took my life with hers. My life is nothing without her in it. Diane (Shelly's mom)
Comment by Kathy Tolbert on January 23, 2011 at 8:50am
My daughter passed away on Dec. 21, 2010 and she left her loving family and a son who turned 4 on Jan.1. I started writing after her death about her life, so later on her son will know his mom, her likes and dislikes and how much she truely loved "her little Ethan" Some days I don't write anything but on the days I do I write page after page, while the tears are rolling down my cheeks. Ethan is too young right now to know what death is and thinks his mommy is on a trip to a place called Heaven and wonders when she is coming back to us and he, as we all do, misses her very much!
Comment by Kathy Tolbert on January 23, 2011 at 8:50am
My daughter passed away on Dec. 21, 2010 and she left her loving family and a son who turned 4 on Jan.1. I started writing after her death about her life, so later on her son will know his mom, her likes and dislikes and how much she truely loved "her little Ethan" Some days I don't write anything but on the days I do I write page after page, while the tears are rolling down my cheeks. Ethan is too young right now to know what death is and thinks his mommy is on a trip to a place called Heaven and wonders when she is coming back to us and he, as we all do, misses her very much!

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