On May 25, 1983. I gave birth to my first child William Matthew Allen AKA Matt. On Feb. 13, 1988 he spent the night with my parents and the house caught on fire. With the layout of the house the fire was between the two sections and my parents went out their back door trying to get in hi window but the fire had already consumed the house. It took them 6 hours to find his body and I was never allowed to see my baby to tell him goodbye.He was a joy to everyone whe knew him and at the age of 4 had spread more love then some do in a lifetime. I was pregnant with my next son and spent 6 weeks in bed for I had startes to hemmorag and they were afraid I was going to loose Davey. Matt was so excited and said if he had a little brother he was gonna name him Davy Crockettso on August 19,1988 we welcomed Davey Crockett Allen into the world. he. He helped me so much for their father was in a very angry state he couldnt seem to shake. I wrapped my workd around davey and when I went back for my 6 week checkup I was pregnant again with twins!!!On July 9, 1989 we welcomed into the world Jamey and Cody. My kids were the light of my life and brought me so much Joy.My husband kept getting worse and refused help and on May, 27, 1992 my husband shot and killed my father and then shot himself. I was left with 1 year old twins and a 2 year old. Later my high school sweetheart came back into my life and and we were married in 1993. In 1995David Phillips adopted Davey Jamey and Cody and with his 3 children Amanda, Ashley and David we became a family with 2 4yr old, 3 three yr olds and a 2 yr old! Very busy. With my bittersweet memories my life was holding joy again and I was happy again! we have had a wonderful life and my kids had brought me so much sunshine! in 1997 we welcomed Jessica ( named after my father) into our family. My family was complete but I was very overprotective and the kids fought me on that tooth and nail! They always found dangerous things to get into and we made several trips to the ER for broken bones and stitches, the 4 boys were by all means all boy.lol.On August 31,2010 we welcomed our first granddaughter Adalyn from our oldest Amanda Then just when you think you have reached your happiest, wham, we lost Cody Feb. 13, 2011. My husband and children have been great. We have all supported  each other just we are scattered out all over now. 2 weeks after Codys death we welcomed our 2nd grandchild, our first grandson Matthew Robert Phillips into our fold and those feelings were so bittersweet. We were all looking forward to his birth especially Cody looking forward to being an Uncle to his twin brothers son. So we call Matty our little ray of sunshine and we know that cody and Matt got to meet him first.Amanda our oldest is in North Carolina married to a Marine. Davey is in Hawaii with the United States Marine Corps gettin ready to deploy to afganistan in the next couple of weeks. Jamey(Codys twin) is in New York with his fiancee and baby Matty. Ashly and David live about 30 miles away with their mother, and Jessica the baby at 14 is still at home .Thank God for cell phones and internet!! and I guess that brings us to date. We are going into our 3rd month without cody and draw on each others strength. The best way I can honor my children in to smile and find happiness for that is how they lived their lives.So I wake up every morning and try to smile and find joy in one thing even if it is just a memory. I will never be the same and a piece of my heart will always be empty, but I have learned through my trials I dont think there is anything in this world can give me that I cant handle. and dont judge anyone till you walk in their shoes