I noticed for the first time since my Peter left that I know longer wake up crying.  My heart still feels like it's being yanked out of my body.  I no longer cry but I still cannot get up in the morning.  I'm late for work everyday.  Thank God I have a compassionate employer.   Each day I put on a happy face so my children won't worry but it isn't getting any better.   My life consist of work and home. I'll be retiring from work in a few  months.   I just can't do it anymore.  I don't return friends calls, or invitiations.  I have only attended church 2 times in the 15 months because the memories are too much.  I remember the last time I was there for his funeral.    I'm writing this post in hopes that someone can relate to this and help me understand.  I tried therapy, taking anti-depression medicine and I still feel empy.  Thank you to the site.  It is nice just to have a place to vent and not feel judged.                                                                                                    

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Comment by Dennis Cole on March 9, 2012 at 6:14am
It is a terrible thing to lose anyone that we love, but to lose a child is a pain that has no words. I am so sorry for your loss.

So many times we are so overwhelmed with grief that we begin to ask questions that have never come to our minds before. Some people stop believing in God. Some people get angry with God and wonder why he did this terrible thing to us. Many people are just left hurting and confused.

But the truth is that God had nothing to do with what has happened. Please take some time to look at the link below.

http://www.watchtower.org/e/bh/article_11.htm

It discusses the question - Why is there so much suffering?

The bible does answer our questions and it gives us a real hope for the future. It tells us that God is not responsible for the suffering in the world, but he has promised a wonderful future for us if we just learn about him and listen to his voice.

As to those that we have lost in death - please use the following links to find out more about what the Bible really teaches.

http://www.watchtower.org/e/bh/article_06.htm
http://www.watchtower.org/e/bh/article_07.htm

This information gave me great comfort. I hope it can do the same for you

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