Over 13 months alone now, but time, like most other things , means little, if anything to me. Each day is very similar to the last, no matter how beautiful the weather, sleepless the nights, aggravating the work, overwhelming the classes, how wonderful the grandbaby...What does it really mean? What value is in it? WHY AM I HERE???? I try to accept God is God & his ways are not for us to question or understand, only to accept and believe that His will is perfect, yet I, in my pitiful human existance cannot help but to constantly question how the most peaceful, joyful, intelligent, hopeful person I have ever known was ripped away from his 12 yr. old son and more selfishly I ask why he was taken from me? Only 38 yrs young, he was eagerly anticipating the opening high school football game later that night- he was going with his son, and my best friend's husband who just happened to be a very good friend of his. He was eagerly anticipating the promotion to Supervisor he had been quietly waiting on for a month or so, that was finally ready now that the current supervisor was retiring. We were planning our honeymoon, had just received our passports, after 8 years of living almost inseperable. I'm lost, yet I continue each day, sometimes just barely, and on a rare occassion I am triumphant. I work, go to school, watch my grandbaby, go to my stepson's football games, pay bills, watch t.v. and every moment of everyday, for 13+ months I miss Larry Dwyane Bradley with all that I am. I cannot contain my tears. I pray I will get my act together and that God will call me home soon. I am reminded that this life is temporary, but a breathe... I am waiting....

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