My partner of 17 years died in our home, in my arms on June 10th. I have never known such desolation, loneliness and heartache. Her sons came from Mississippi, claimed the body, had her cremated and took the ashes home with them. Never gave me a look back. If there was a memorial or remembrance service I certainly was never informed of it. I come home to an empty house and walk from room to room and just don't know what to do with myself. The mere sight of her belongings is painful and often makes me cry. I walk around talking to her as if she was here. I was her caregiver for sometime now and while those duties no longer exist, the time to do them does.......I am just very lost. I am also feeling the burden of maintaining a two income home on one income now. I am also caring for the dogs we shared, Murphy and Sadie, and they are indeed a comfort but Murphy is 14 years old and I fear that my next loss won't be that far off in the future. I am about 2 1/2 years out from my own retirement and honestly don't know what direction to go now. I have a son and a daughter but both live in different states from me, my parents are deceased, and my sibling are scattered across the country. Thank you all for listening and caring. I am glad that there is a site such as this for our community.