The heart wants what the head can't deliver.

I have been a psychotherapist since 1975. I have spoken to many people who came to me about how the head and the heart are not always in sync. I am living that in real time these days. My head knows that Rose is dead and not coming back but my heart refuses to accept it. I get in my car, turn on the radio and start crying. I tell her how much I miss her all the time. I went to a concert we both would have enjoyed and all I could think about was how much she would have liked it.The waves just keep coming and I plow through somehow in a way that is bewildering to me. I have wonderful friends and her family has been marvelous to me. However, a hole the size of the Grand Canyon is very difficult to fill. I am so grateful for having found this site.

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Comment by Chicago Beard on July 24, 2011 at 5:45pm: Was watching Return of the Mummy on TV. In the movie Brendan Fasiers wife is killed and he holds her and keeps saying "come back." Of course I immediately started crying and calling out to my Rose to do the same thing. It is amazing how the littlest things will trigger me.

Comment by Chicago Beard on July 23, 2011 at 12:11pm: I just heard a song by a performer named Christina Perry, The chorus is "You put your arms around me and I'm home." That is what my Rose and I used to say to each other when we hugged. Of course I started crying. The saying came into my head "you can never go home again." It has new meaning now, more crying. Hugs to all!

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